Emerging Grace

This Site Has Moved

2007-11-10T10:56:00.000-07:00

to Kingdom Grace
(Just click on the words Kingdom Grace. They are linked to the new blog.)

Looking for Advice and Opinions

2007-11-06T12:07:00.000-07:00

When Julie first discussed the possibility of switching to wordpress, I decided to check into it also. The easiest way to explore having a blog there was to actually set one up.

Blogger can handle most anything that I want to do on a blog, so I can't really explain why I would move except that I'm just ready for a change. In fact, the things that I can do fairly adeptly with blogger I have trouble accomplishing at wordpress. But hey, learning is good, right?

I set up a wordpress-hosted blog, which is my preference. So far, I have the theme and design arranged in a way that I like. One of my favorite features is the ability to have pages. But I haven't decided yet if I should pull the trigger and make the switch.

Here are the questions that you can help me with:

1. What are the things that will potentially frustrate me working with wordpress in comparison to blogger?

2. Should I make a clean break and a fresh start, or should I import everything from this blog to the new one?

3. Do I have anything else to say? Should I continue to write simply as a person trying to make sense of this journey? What can my voice contribute to the conversation?

4. Somewhat related to the first question, what are the limitations of wordpress that I might encounter?

5. Any style, design advice, opinions, favorite features, etc?

I'm all ears!

WWJS - to me?

2007-11-05T18:27:00.000-07:00

Signs of my lack of athletic prowess were evident fairly early in life. I remember being taught to ride bicycle at the ripe age of 8 6. It seems there were quite a few people willing to run alongside me in hopes that I would eventually ride independently.

Now that I think of it, people seemed worried. I'm glad that I didn't realize at the time that I wasn't measuring up. What I do remember is the day when it seemed that all of the practicing finally paid off.

Finally I was coasting across the yard solo! Exuberant with joy, I turned to wave at my parents, who I knew would be proudly watching, only to see looks of horror on their face. That is when I hit the picnic table.

This is the story that came to mind as I thought about the meme that Jim tagged me with, What would Jesus say to me? The words that came to mind immediately were, "Come'on, follow me." Then I think he would add, "Don't forget, I am with you."

Because He knows I forget. When I forget He is with me, it is just like the bicycle ride. Instead of trusting that He is alongside me every step of the way, I go flailing out of control and end up plowing into a disaster.

But He doesn't forget, and He is always there with simple reminders like, "I love you, I'm here, don't be afraid, it's okay, let's try again, I'll always be with you."

If you would like to participate in this meme, consider yourself tagged. Please include a link to Jim's blog.

The Wrath of God?

2007-11-03T22:26:00.000-06:00

Unfortunately I saw the piece on 20/20 this week interviewing Shirley Phelps about the Westboro lawsuit. It was disgustingly awful to watch children singing "God Hates the World and All Her People."

Admittedly this particular group is extreme fringe. However I feel that same disappointment when I read websites, blogs, and comments that portray God as hateful and angry. I believe a message that heavily emphasizes judgment and wrath misrepresents God.

On a certain website, concerning the gospel as presented by John MacArthur, Doug Pagitt was quoted to say: "I do not say "perverted" lightly, either. I really think what he communicates is so distant from the message of the Bible that it is dangerously harmful to people."

It is harmful if the message portrayed is so far from the truth of who God is that it repels people. When people preach a narrow gospel of an angry and vindictive God, they don't seem to realize that they project their own anger and hatred onto God.

I believe it was Anne Lamott who said, "You can safely assume that you’ve created God in your own image when it turns out that God hates all the same people you do."

Sometimes I wonder about why people hang onto this angry version of God. They seem afraid to believe in God's kindness, love, and mercy. Kind of like it's too good to be true.

It's not just the extremists. I think most of us have a small piece of the angry God that we've struggled to let go of, the picture of God we imagine when we are feeling ashamed or unworthy - the disapproving father, the harsh taskmaster, the unsatisfied perfectionist.

What if we are transformed by love instead of by law?

Legalism requires the harsh language of sin, judgment, and wrath. But what if God is completely confident in the power of love to transform a heart without threats and intimidation? Of course, living that way would require faith in the transforming power of God's love instead of trusting in control.

Personally, I think the greatest revelation that we, individually and as the church, will have is a growing revelation of God's love. His love has the power to redeem and restore in a way that judgment and condemnation never can. I don't think we, the church, have yet come close to imagining or expressing the depths of God's love.

Can His love be taken to an extreme?
I don't think so. What do you think?

Semper Reformanda

2007-11-01T07:39:00.000-06:00

Always reforming.

I recently read the 95 theses for the first time. It seems that Luther was quite the deconstructionist.

Reforming and emerging are really the same concept - the idea of becoming, as the church, all that God intends for us to be. Or as Paul would say, "growing up into him who is the Head, that is, Christ."

As a belated reformation day gesture, today I nail my versoin of 95 theses. Some of these are paraphrases of Luther's statements. Others, where I couldn't make much sense of the original thesis, are my own thoughts.

May we continue emerging, reforming, and becoming.

1. One's whole life should reflect repentance and a heart for the kingdom of God.
2. The life of the kingdom cannot be administered by clergy.
3. This inner change of heart must have an outward expression also.
4. Peace and shalom will become a reality for us as we participate in God's kingdom.
5. We are not condemned by men and their laws.
6. Neither can we be restored by men or religion.
7. God restores us as we humbly submit ourselves to the reign of Jesus.
8. We enter into this relationship and kingdom life while we are yet living.
9. The Holy Spirit is our teacher and reveals to us the heart of the Father.
10. Ignorant and wicked are the ministers who do not use their influence to lead others to this free relationship with God.
11. The church has been asleep, allowing religious tradition to replace the life God intended for his people.
12. Forgiveness and grace are available to all, even before they believe.
13. God's grace frees us from death and condemnation.
14. The condition of a soul separated from the love of God is fear and hopelessness.
15. We should not forget the despair of being lost.
16. Hell and heaven are current realities, as are despair and shalom.
17. With souls in the balance, it seems that love must increase to counter despair.
18. There is no one outside the bounds of God's love.
19. There is assurance of salvation for those who believe in Jesus.
20. This salvation is the free gift of God through Jesus, not dependent on anyone or anything else.
21. Those who suggest that salvation or God's approval can be earned are in error.
22. They hinder access to the free grace of God.
23. We are all undeserving of God's grace.
24. We are deceived if we believe that we can earn God's blessing.
25. A minister has no authority except that which is given to him by those who submit themselves to him.
26. A leader does well when he leads, not with power, but with humble service.
27. It is deceitful to suggest that giving money to a ministry releases God's blessing.
28. Money and greed can distract the church from the real message and ministry of the power of God.
29. The condition of a man's heart is known only to God.
30. Our own heart can deceive us.
31. The wise man remains humbly aware of his brokenness.
32. Those who try to earn their salvation, and those who teach this, will miss experiencing the grace of God.
33. Beware of teachers and leaders who presume to mediate God's grace.
34. Traditions and rituals do not have the power to redeem or restore.
35. True Christian doctrine points us to relationship with Jesus and the life of a disciple.
36. Forgiveness is available freely to those who call on the name of Jesus.
37. Every Christian is an equal member and participant in the church, the body of Christ.
38. Participation in the life of the church is necessary in the formation of a disciple.
39. It is difficult, even for the wisest teachers, to adequately present the fullness of God's love and kindness.
40. True repentance recognizes the life and peace found in choosing God's way.
41. Sermons and teaching should not be preferable to good works of love.
42. Tithes and offerings cannot replace or substitute for acts of mercy.
43. Giving to the poor and needy is better than paying dues at church.
44. Growth comes by loving others rather than by religious duty.
45. How can we see a man in need and pass by, missing the opportunity to show the love of God?
46. One should be responsible first in caring for the needs in their family.
47. Giving is an expression of love from the heart, not an obligation.
48. Leaders should be more interested in prayers than pocketbooks.
49. It is useful to be taught and equipped by others, but this should not replace dependence on God.
50. Leaders who build their empires on the backs of those whom they were entrusted to serve will eventually come to ruin.
51. God does not turn a blind eye to corruption in the church.
52. Church membership does not guarantee salvation.
53. The message of the gospel of the kingdom will always be relevant.
54. Injury is done to the cause of Christ when this gospel message is replaced with self-help sermons or with narrow legalism.
55. The gospel, which is the very greatest thing, still has the power to change lives.
56. This power has not been adequately known or demonstrated by the people of God.
57. Many of the gifts and blessings given to the church have been hoarded rather than poured out.
58. When the power of the gospel is made known, it will always work grace for the inner man.
59. One of the treasures of the church is the poor among us.
60. Christ demonstrated for us the keys and manner of life in the kingdom.
61. Life in the kingdom cannot be experienced apart from knowing Him.
62. The true treasure of the church is the gospel of the glory and the grace of God.
63. The subversive nature of the gospel is often ignored because it requires that the first be last.
64. The real life of the kingdom is demonstrated when the last are made to be first.
65. The kingdom does not favor men of power, wealth, and influence.
66. Rather it recognizes the treasure to be found in the souls of the poor and marginalized.
67. Some preachers' greatness only serves to build their personal kingdom.
68. These kingdoms are worthless when compared to the reality of God's kingdom and grace.
69. Yet they establish power and influence for themselves within the church.
70. They preach their own dreams rather than the gospel.
71. Woe to those who succumb to the temptations of fame and greatness.
72. Blessing to those who guard against the lust of power and influence.
73. There should be concern about those who strive for power in the church.
74. Much more, there should be outrage over those who injure love and truth in their quest for position.
75. To think religious rituals have the power to save - this is madness.
76. They will do nothing to remove guilt or shame.
77. Even the greatest apostles did not have the power to forgive or save.
78. Yet even the least believer is given access to the grace, power, and spiritual gifts of God.
79. It is blasphemy to allow religious traditions and doctrine to overshadow the simplicity of the gospel.
80. Ministers who do so will account for their narrow misrepresentation of God's message.
81. This misrepresentation makes it difficult to rescue the true message of the gospel from legalism and religious tradition.
82. Why has the simplicity of the gospel become overwhelmed and complicated by layers of institution and hierarchy?
83. Why do clergy teach followers to be indebted to and dependent upon them?
84. Why has the free gift of grace become shrouded in religious obligation?
85. Why have the traditions of church been embraced as if the traditions themselves carried the weight of Scripture?
86. Why do church organizations absorb so much of the money that should go to the poor?
87. Why have gatherings been structured as if only one person is capable of sharing their gifts and talents?
88. What a greater blessing it would be if every believer were to participate in gatherings and ministry.
89. Those who are truly interested in the salvation of souls will minister freely without regard for position or titles.
90. To repress these questions of how the church functions will only serve to add to the decline of the church as it currently exists.
91. When the church truly reflects the message of Christ it will be credible to the world.
92. Woe to those who refuse to recognize this challenge to the status quo.
93. Embrace the prophets who call us to envision the potential of the church and the reality of the kingdom in our midst.
94. Christ-followers must live according to the way of Christ, our example.
95. Even if this way leads to suffering, we are confident of the reality of the kingdom of God in which we live.

10-20-30

2007-10-30T07:00:00.002-06:00

Since I just scrapped my latest post, this is probably a good time to respond to this meme. I have enjoyed reading the answers of various friends around the blogosphere and was recently tagged by Brother Maynard.

In looking back at these points in time, I realize that in each year mentioned, I was standing at the edge of change. Maybe I will look back in 10 years and say the same thing about 2007.

1997 was the beginning of an extremely church-centered lifestyle. Our church had dived into the renewal movement (ie Toronto blessing) with meetings and services geared toward "soaking and refreshing" and then transitioned into the prophetic movement. For the most part, these were really good years of growth, wonderful relationships, and spiritual excitement.

1987 was the beginning of an intensely child-centered lifestyle. This was the year we started our family. We lost our first child in early '87, but I was pregnant again later in '87. Within a few years, we had our babies and realized we needed to quit procreating.

This was the beginning of a life of diapers and car seats that would last for quite a few years. Outings were afternoons in the park and walks with strollers. Eating out always meant going somewhere with a playland. Entertainment was feeding the ducks and geese at the park or throwing sticks in a stream.

1977 - What can you say about the 70's?
You had to be there.

In 1977, I finished my sophomore year of highschool and started my junior year. During that summer I morphed from an innocent kid to a rebellious teenager. The next few years of my life revolved around friends, pool halls, disco, boys, and partying. Being the overachiever that I am, I managed to hit bottom in 3 short years. That's a story for another day.

I recently read that a person's musical DNA is set during the late teens, which means that mine was set to disco, sappy ballads, and pop-rock. For a flashback to the 70's, I leave you with a video clip of "Cold as Ice" by Foreigner.

I'll tag a few of my favorite newish blog friends. If you've already done it, never mind. I know this one's been around for a while.

1. Amber at Homeschool Diva.
2. Dan at Danno's Dangerous Mind.
3. Mary at One Thing is Needed.
4. Rickard at Vikingson's Place.
5. Jeff at Thoughts from Jeff.

Habits

2007-10-24T08:24:00.001-06:00

Recently I've been thinking about praying the Daily Office. To be honest, I've never understood the attraction toward elements of monasticism.

I wonder about moving from the freedom to be in a natural relationship of conversation with the Father into a schedule of rote prayers. But I am trying to listen to the voices of those who have experienced this and feel it is a beneficial part of their spiritual journey.

It likely doesn't have to be an either/or, in that one could do the Daily Office in addition to their relational conversation with Papa.

The rhythm and discipline could be positive if they don't become a form of religious obligation. Also, I could use some more spiritual/religious language in both my prayers and my everyday life.

I'm just not sure what my husband will think of my new habit.

The Cool Kids

2007-10-21T06:53:00.000-06:00

Everyone wants to be in the in crowd.

Why?

First there is the natural desire to belong, to be included, and to be wanted. There are also perceptions of power and position associated with various groups.

I have noticed a similar pattern of reactions with emerging/missional conferences and events. First there is the reported excitement and camaraderie of those who were able to attend. This is often followed by criticism or comments by others about the resulting dynamic of the group.

Too young and hip.
Too artsy.
Too white.
Too male.
Too old and boring.

I have mixed feelings about conferences and events. On the social side of things I would enjoy getting to meet others on this journey. However I still feel hesitant about the idea that conferences will define and shape the movement, that it will become centralized around a few dominant voices.

At what point do conferences and events, by nature, add to the perception of who is in and who is important in the conversation? Are we still attempting to gather around the experts? Is there a presumption that those gathered will become the voice for the many?

I am referring to conferences in general. At what point do we go from gathering to learn, support, and encourage to reverting to old, familiar power structures?

I know that many of my own feelings and reactions have less to do with gender, which I believe is a valid reaction also, and more to do with my aversion to hierarchy and the centralizing of movements.

To be honest, I don't know how I feel about the whole thing, conferences themselves and the reactions to them.

That's where you come in. Tell me what you think.

This is Emerging Grace

2007-10-19T05:40:00.001-06:00

...and this is the post that I wish I had written on the emerging church.

From Rick McKinley*:

"There will be important contributions made to theological and ecclesiological work. However if we insist that this young emerging church declare their college major right now, we may be killing the very thing that God is doing by putting a yoke upon them that God did not ask them to carry, but was one that we invented out of the fear of what they might become."

"Perhaps God is emerging something that is counter cultural to the way we have been doing it. He may be bringing about something that is seemingly small and insignificant but that will over time grow into something richer and fuller and more transformational than we have seen in some time.

We will never get to see it however, if we are impatient with the process, if we don’t have time or..................... grace to allow it to emerge..."

Don't miss reading the entire post!

*Rick is pastor of the Imago Dei Community in Portland. I recently reviewed his book This Beautiful Mess here.

Missional Dudes

2007-10-18T22:00:00.000-06:00

This was one of my favorite early posts. Being new to the blogosphere, I asked my readers to point me to some of their favorite dudebloggers.

It was admittedly a bit of a light-hearted parody of Brother Maynard's post Wanted:Emerging/Missional Chick Bloggers. Both of our posts generated a lot of links and led to the discovery of some of my favorite blogs.

Originally there was some discussion over whether the guy in the picture was the "real" Brother Maynard. I guess not. ;)

In spite of a tendency to bring beer into the conversation and despite the fact that without exception they all have "hot" wives, you have to admit that there are some great missional dudebloggers and excellent missional conversations happening these days.

Many of the missional dudes spent this week together at the Allelon Conference on Missional Orders.

Andrew Jones was hosted at the conference organized by "Alan Roxburgh whose sausages are no match for my steak," according to Andrew.

It looks like the missional dudes got down to some serious discussion after their dark beer.

(photo ht Len Hjalmarson)

Spiritual Abuse Recovery Survey

2007-10-17T17:16:00.001-06:00

Some of you may have seen this posted on other blogs. If this applies to you, please take the time to help Barb out with her research so that her results can be an accurate reflection of this situation.

Barb Orlowski is in the Doctor of Ministry program at A.C.T.S. Seminaries in Langley, B.C., Canada. In order to conduct the research necessary to complete her dissertation, she could use your help.

She has prepared two questionnaires concerning abusive ministry leadership.

One survey is for those who have experienced emotional and spiritual distress under authoritarian and controlling church leaders and have recovered from this experience. She does not encourage your participation if doing so will cause you emotional distress.

The other survey is for pastors who have been able to provide spiritual guidance and encouragement for individuals who have faced this type of emotional and spiritual pain at the hands of those that they had trusted as their spiritual leaders.

Respond to either request by emailing Barb at churchexitersq@telus.net.

Please let her know at which site you saw this information.

When you e-mail Barb, she will send you the questionnaire.

The responses given by those participating will be kept confidential.

Missional Conversation at Our House

2007-10-15T08:15:00.002-06:00

Standing around the island, my husband fixing himself a snack, while I cleaned up the pizza boxes that had accumulated over the weekend, we ended up on the topic of church and our church future once again.

This probably explains why we're stuck, or in a more positive light, still processing. I'm not implying that either of us are right or wrong. It's just where we are at, today.

We were talking about our current church situation when I said, "I read the other day that in any given situation, we always have at least 3 options."

"Oh really?"

"Yeah, so the way I see it, these are our 3 options:

1. We could host a gathering of believers that we enjoy being with. This would be fun and comfortable. Gathering for the purpose of encouraging one another is important."

"That might be fun. For awhile."

"2. We could find a missional purpose and allow community to develop around that."

"I already have a missional purpose."
"You do not."
"Yes, I do. I've always had a missional purpose."
"You have not."
"Yes, I have."
"Never mind."

"3. We could keep attending church."

"Yep, that's the one I pick. I'm going to just keep doing what I'm doing."

"What are you doing?"

"Spending my time with people outside of church."

End of conversation, for today.

Charismissional

2007-10-12T06:28:00.000-06:00

Charismissional is the topic of the October issue of The Porpoise Diving Life with Robbymac as guest editor.

Brother Maynard has an introductory post explaining the compilation of this issue and asking for discussion and opinion concerning the relevance of this topic to the emerging/missional conversation.

I'd like to highlight a few of the articles here to hopefully give you a taste of some of the articles that might interest you. We would welcome comments and feedback about the articles at our blogs.

Additional articles and reviews for the October issue can be read at PDL.

Chrysalis: From Post-Charismatic To Charismissional
From Robby's article Chrysalis, this is descriptive of the process I feel as a post-charismatic, wondering which expressions of my former charismatic life are dead and which will be transformed.

"I like the imagery of the chrysalis as a metaphor for the journey that post-charismatics find themselves on. In the cocoon stage, a caterpillar looks – in the outer expression – dead and withered. Yet a metamorphosis, a transformation, is taking place in a deep and hidden place."

(Charis-)Missional Evangelism
In his article on Missional Evangelism, noting a hesitation towards the use of the term charismissional, Brother Maynard describes the merging of lifestyle evangelism and power evangelism into a more holistic demonstration of faith which lends itself to his tagline, "Live your faith, share your life."

"I propose we share our lives. If our faith is active, if we are living it, the sharing of our lives puts our faith in proximity with others... and opportunities both for proclamation and demonstration will result in natural contexts."

Prophetic Ministry, Reimagined Missionally
Prophetic Ministry, Reimagined Missionally is the result of a lengthy e-mail conversation that I had with Brother Maynard. It was interesting to discover how many parallel experiences that we had with prophetic ministry in our former lives. Brother Maynard brilliantly edited the conversation with its many tangents into this condensed and coherent article.

"Prophecy is to give us a glimpse of the reign of God, to give us understanding of His solution for our brokenness, insight into His intentions toward us. Part of our role as prophetic people is to be those who see, believe, and declare God's redemptive purposes."

Why Charismissional?
In my article, Why Charismissional?, I first hope to stress that the topic and emphasis of the Holy Spirit should not be a charismatics-only concern. I am hopeful that within the emerging/missional conversation we can embrace the necessity of the involvement of the Holy Spirit without delineations between charismatics and non-charismatics. The majority of this article is a letter to my charismatic friends challenging our former lack of missional intent in pursuit of spiritual gifts and experiences.

"Traditional charismatic expression has little connection or relevance to the outside world. Our use of charismatic gifts has not compelled us to go to those to whom we are called. The deeper we went in our quest for the things of the Spirit, the further removed we became from knowing and relating to those who do not yet know Jesus."

A Missional View of Healing and Deliverance
Finally, in my article, A Missional View of Healing and Deliverance, I just brush on the idea of personal healing and deliverance as an aspect of reconciliation and the missio dei.

"God has a big-picture plan for the reconciliation of all of creation. However, in the midst of that, there is also a very real plan for our personal healing and deliverance. Healing and deliverance is a part of our ongoing salvation, of being restored to the wholeness that God intended for us."

Because feedback isn't possible at the PDL site, we welcome your comments and response about these articles at any of our blogs.

Book Review:This Beautiful Mess

2007-10-11T10:27:00.000-06:00

I vividly remember sitting in a Sunday School class many years ago with my husband as newlyweds. The topic of discussion was the kingdom of God. Somewhat hesitantly, we offered up the opinion that perhaps the kingdom was already here. We were readily dismissed by the older, wiser members of the class, including the teacher.

In This Beautiful Mess, Rick McKinley presents the present reality of the kingdom in a way that makes it simple to understand yet difficult to ignore.

In Christian circles, I think that the kingdom is sometimes glossed over as just a vague religious idea, perhaps equated more often with thoughts of heaven and a future destination. However, the gospel that Jesus taught was not the gospel of salvation, but rather the gospel of the kingdom. That is why it is so important for us to understand the kingdom of God as more than just a vague concept.

Rick did a brilliant job of cracking a window open in order for those who read his book to catch a bigger vision and clearer picture of the kingdom of God. My absolute favorite chapter in the book is Chapter 5, "A Dimension of Being." In this chapter, he describes the present reality of the kingdom and the need for us to develop the understanding and vision to recognize the kingdom around and among us.

In the latter half of the book, as the subtitle, "practicing the presence of the kingdom of God," suggests, Rick then opens a door and issues an invitation to participate in the kingdom. He offers real and practical ways of encountering the kingdom of God, ways in which both individuals and communities can experience a lifestyle of kingdom living, of participating in God's mission.

There are gems of wisdom and insight in each chapter as he explains what the kingdom might look like in different aspects of life including encountering the kingdom among children; ministering in the margins; the presence of the kingdom in creation; a kingdom perspective of wealth, giving, and money; and a look at suffering and our own willingness to enter into sacrifice and suffering.

Throughout the book, Rick has painted a picture of the kingdom of God, the kingdom established when Jesus chose to enter into This Beautiful Mess and the invitation for us to do likewise, to participate in his kingdom by immersing our lives in This Beautiful Mess.

Rick doesn't coerce or manipulate in his writing. His invitation to practice the kingdom is gentle. However, if taken seriously, your life will be challenged and changed.

Church Organization versus Church Organism

2007-10-08T06:26:00.000-06:00

I would like to lay out a few things that I've been thinking about and would love some feedback from you about these ideas. Lately I have been mentally trying to dissect the spiritual organism of the church from the structures and organizations that we know as the church.

I'll start with this quote from George Hunsberger that I read at Brad Brisco's blog, The Missional Church Network:

"Increasingly, formal organizational structures are what we use the term church to designate. The structures have thus become a functional substitute for the social organism the New Testament calls “church.” In the end, in America the church has come to be understood as a “vendor of religious services and goods” in what Roger Finke and Rodney Stark have dubbed our “religious economy.” We live then in a world of religious consumers and religious firms in the business of serving them."

This isn't necessarily to say that structure and organization are the problem. In fact, when a group reaches a certain size, structure and organization are inevitable. So based on the size of the organization we are involved in, there will be a certain amount of necessary structure and organization.

Gary Goodell has an interesting article at epermission about the group dynamics of various size groups. He has this to say about the administration of groups:

"In a culture stung with the marketing ego that "bigger is better," we must always be cautious as to why we "count" certain things. Again, numbers are not to be used against one another, but as in the cases in the model of Jesus and Scripture, the truth is that we can better steward what is happening relationally when the group is the right size, and become aware of the shifts and changes that can occur so we can accommodate different sized groupings and thus different dynamics."

When I was writing the leadership articles, I touched on the idea of divorcing administrative leadership from spiritual leadership.

“We have blurred the lines within the church between the administrative organization and the organic spiritual life of the church body. While a person may be needed to administratively lead an organizational structure, if that structure happens to be a church group, he must not assume that his organizational rank presumes an elevated spiritual position in the group.”

In my comment to Jonathan Brink at Missio Dei on his recent post about leadership, I added these thoughts:

"I see that this is where the confusion often occurs within the church in regard to leadership. It is often assumed and taught that spiritual authority follows the same lines as organizational authority.

There is nothing wrong with organizational leadership within a church if we recognize it as an administrative function for the purpose of structural organization. If our church structure is an organization, it is helpful to have effective administration of that organization.

The problems begin when we believe that the church organization is the same as the organic church body. Within the church, we have tried to combine a role of spiritual and organizational leadership into one person called the pastor. In that, we end up with a perverted role that fits neither description."

Is it fair that we employ someone for the role of administering an organization and then put a spiritual title of pastor on them? Yes, perhaps they will pastor as a part of their role in the organization. But should the spiritual ministry for an entire group fall on the shoulders of one person? Perhaps it would be more accurate to refer to them as the director or administrator. I think that we frequently substitute administrative leadership in the church for spiritual leadership.

Which leads to further questions of whether we pay someone for spiritual ministry which is being addressed by Alan Knox at his blog. I tend to lean towards the ideal that spiritual ministry should be shared among the body. However, depending on the size of the group, it may be necessary to employ organizational and administrative services.

Looking at the church we are attending as an example, they are a large organization that puts on a Sunday morning service for the purpose of attracting seekers. They are up front in stating that "church" doesn't happen in the Sunday service, but rather in the small groups that meet during the week. While the leader is doing a fine job of directing this organization, his personal level of involvement with people doesn't suggest a role of pastor, in spite of the fact that his title is Senior Pastor.

So back to dissecting:

In examining our organizations, where is the organic life of the church?

Does it occur in a Sunday morning service?

Are there some occasions of gathering where church doesn't occur?

What about the role of the pastor?

What is the difference between gathering as the church and having a religious service?

Feel free to address any or all of these ideas and questions.

What Was He Thinking?!

2007-10-06T08:24:00.000-06:00

"I mean, knowing us so well, was it wise, really, to entrust so much hope in the ongoing reconciliation of the world to us? Does God really believe that in the hands of the small and weak, small and weak things can be healed? Are we made of the right stuff to be a helpful partner to Jesus in this holy work?" (Kayla McClurg)

Sometimes I forget...

"God chose the weak things of the world to shame the strong." (I Cor.1:27)

"My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." (II Cor.12:9)

Meme: These Four Things

2007-10-05T13:27:00.000-06:00

I've been tagged by Brother Maynard in a meme based on the book unChristian, which is apparently a book about why people don't like Christians.

Here's the scoop:

List four things about Christians: three negative perceptions and one thing that Christians should be known for.

Negative Perceptions:

1. Christians are arrogant.
They are so comfortable in their rightness that they often are not able to relate to unbelievers without talking down to them.

2. Christians are difficult.
Ask any waitress. Christians are frequently known for being bad customers. They can be demanding and seem to believe that they are deserving of special treatment.

3. Christians are hypocrites.
It doesn't take watching Christians very long to realize that we fall far short of the ideals we espouse. Perhaps this is related to the first one. If we were more humble in our attitudes, maybe we wouldn't be judged as harshly in our weaknesses and failures.

Positive Thought:

4. Christians should be generous.
I'm not sure if this is the number one thing, but it is a concrete way to put our love in action. When we are generous with our time, our money, and our attitudes we can begin to exemplify the love we claim to have.

Tagged:
1. Barb
2. Heather
3. Mary
4. Paul

I look forward to hearing their thoughts on this.

Do you like Christians?

Keeping the Water Clean

2007-10-04T08:20:00.000-06:00

I am not sure that I actually remember this, but instead I think that it is more a memory of a memory. In our family's legend and history the story has been repeated often, as we are wont to do with stories of a silly or embarrassing nature.

Many, many years ago, as a wee child, I was in the bathtub with my older sister who is older than me by only eleven months. Somewhere in the midst of our bathtime fun, my sister pooed in the tub and our bathtime fun came to an abrupt end.

S#*% happens, there's a mess in the water, and no one comes out clean.

The aftermath of the Driscoll podcast seemed like this to me.

Mark left a "baby ruth" in the pool of the emerging conversation, the blogosphere erupted, and further misunderstanding and disagreement was generated.

Bob Hyatt is concerned about the appropriateness of winking. I agree with him that in some cases it might not be a purely motivated response. In the end, each person will have to take responsibility for their actions and motives - some will have to account for winking (Repent, ye guilty winkers!) and others will have to account for judging their brothers in Christ.

I understand the concern that we remain teachable and able to receive critique and correction with openness and humility. However, I do not believe that Mark's podcast provided the measuring stick for proving our teachability because it was not a valid, substantiated critique. When people react to being misrepresented, it is not fair to say they are dismissively unteachable.

Honestly, I believe that valid disagreement and critique does occur both within and from outside the emerging conversation, but it doesn't get the air time that Mark's controversial comments have. As only one example among many, I remember Ben Witherington's review of Rob Bell's book "Sex God" that included valid points of disagreement in the context of a fair review.

On the opposite extreme, there are also those pools in the blogsophere, where the water is warm and yellow, that I would suggest be avoided completely. It has been proven repeatedly that genuine discussion isn't possible in that environment. I won't provide links, but you may have visited those pools also. Don't swim there!

The main reason I posted on this once more is to point out that Stephen Shields has reposted his link to Theological Disagreement and the Emergent Church. There is no better summary of the standard that should be required of those who disagree with or attack the emerging church and of us in determining which are worthy of a response.

There will continue to be disagreement both from within and around the emerging conversation. It is a broad spectrum of people, backgrounds, and perspectives. There is no intention of solidifying into a single, all-encompassing, standardized statement of belief, which is why we must know how to express and handle disagreement.

I suggest we take some of the wisdom and strategy from Stephen's guidelines and make them our standard of response:

"Understanding the other calls for imagination, because we have to provisionally assume the other may be correct - or at least partially correct - if we are to truly listen. We may have to hold our convictions in abeyance as we hypothetically consider the position of the other."

Does this mean we must always agree? No, but it does mean that we should attempt understanding before voicing disagreement, and in the case of voicing disagreement, we must be careful to not misrepresent the other person's point of view. It also means that it is okay to shrug off the opinions of those who have not done the work of attempting to understand.

Brian's latest book, Everything Must Change, may provide just the opportunity for us to practice expressing different points of view about doctrine, theology, and the issues of our day. I expect that there will be plenty of dialog discussing those ideas and the areas of agreement and disagreement. There is an indepth review about the book by Alan Mann here.

Scot McKnight is also reviewing the book at Jesus Creed. I find the comments by Michael Kruse most interesting. Based on his expertise in this area, I would love to see an extensive, indepth review by him of the political, economic, and social issues addressed in the book.

Brian is not the pope of the emerging conversation, and we aren't all expected to agree with him. The emerging conversation will not come apart at the seams when we do disagree. But agree or not, we should attempt to respect and understand the heart and motive of the person putting forth the ideas.

This video from Allelon is an interesting look at Brian and his response to critics. (ht:Bill Kinnon) I think it would be great if his critics would at least take a moment to consider Brian the person before ripping into Brian the figurehead and author.

Disagreement is and has been welcome in the emerging conversation when it is approached with an attitude of respect and a desire for genuine dialog. That is one of the trademarks and strengths of the conversation.

But don't expect to receive a favorable response if you poo in the water.

Asked and Answered

2007-10-02T05:41:00.000-06:00

Great questions by Gordon MacDonald at Out of Ur about the lack of spiritually mature Christians.

He distinguishes between churchly and mature...

"Now mature, in my book does not mean the “churchly,” those who have mastered the vocabulary and the litany of church life, who come alive only when the church doors open. Rather, I have in mind those who walk through all the corridors of the larger life—the market-place, the home and community, the playing fields—and do it in such a way that, sooner or later, it is concluded that Jesus’ fingerprints are all over them."

While he is asking what is wrong in our discipleship process, he also makes an interesting statement...

"The tragedy is that they may well be there in embryo, waiting to be discovered, waiting for sound training, waiting to be emancipated from the cult of the mediocre."

Great answers from Alan Hirsch at Forgotten Ways on the process of discipleship...

"And this is exactly how Jesus does discipleship: he organizes it around mission. As soon as they are called He takes the disciples on an adventurous journey of mission, ministry, and learning. Straightaway are involved in proclaiming the Kingdom of God, serving the poor, healing, and casting out demons. And it is active and direct disciple-making in the context of mission.

If we accept that Jesus forms the primary pattern of disciple-making for the church, then we must say that discipleship is our core task. But if disciple-making lies at the heart of our commission then we must organize it around mission because mission is the catalyzing principle of discipleship. In Jesus they are inexorably linked."

The structure of church has become like a noose in the discipleship process. Rather than discipling and training for mission, it seems that the majority of training is for "ministry" which has come to mean service within the church system.

So many people clamor for positional ministry while at the same time missing the opportunity to be involved in the real service of ministry. It saddens me to hear of young men or women who cannot find mentors and elders in their lives, yet within the same community there is a line around the block for "leadership" training.

Unless the institutions of church divorce themselves from raising up volunteers for their programs and creating structures of importance and inclusion based upon participation in those programs, we will not see real maturity or discipleship.

Dry

2007-10-01T10:29:00.000-06:00

I was noticing the plant out on my deck. I think it's a mum or something.

I'm not really a plant person. (That is a huge understatement.)

It needs water.

The flowers in the middle are still bright yellow, but it's getting a little crusty around the edges.

Actually, it's been needing water for a while now. I thought maybe it would rain, but it hasn't.

Whenever I see it, I am reminded that I should water it.

What's the use. It's October, and it's going to die anyway.

Today, I am like the mum.

I'll respond to comments when I'm feeling a little less crusty around the edges.

Just Life

2007-09-30T13:38:00.001-06:00

The conversations around the blogosphere about labels make me more aware than ever that I don't really fit into a particular box. Sometimes I feel like an observer of my own strange ecclesial journey. There seem to be plenty of interesting twists and turns.

Saturday evening my husband and I were visited by a couple seeking God about the possibility of planting a church in our area. We had a huddle before they arrived about how we should behave ourselves.

Our goals for the evening:
1. Not to blow their dreams out of the water.
2. Not to overly encourage them.
3. Not to be too likeable. ;)

I don't know how we did, although I am sure they had an interesting conversation on the 2-hour drive back to the place they are staying.

My husband woke me up during the night talking in his sleep. He typically doesn't dream and never talks in his sleep. He was saying...

"No,no! No,no,no! No!
No,no,no,no! No,no!"

I wonder what that's all about.

Smoke and Mirrors

2007-09-29T13:58:00.001-06:00

It amazes me what can be accomplished by insinuation in the realm of public opinion. A few well-placed suggestions combined with groupthink, and suddenly suspicion is cast, doubt is created, and reputations are smeared.

I am fairly familiar with this tool of communication, having found myself on the wrong side of its damaging effect. Learning by experience the intricacies of how this method of persuasion works, I have also watched it used repeatedly, but effectively, on others at my CLB.

In our situation, the leadership at our former church had to explain why we suddenly left. Their options were:

1. The truth - that we disagreed with them to the degree that we would choose to leave our friends and church home.

2. Imply guilt about us.

I wish they had chosen option one, but then they would have had to deal with questions about the real disagreement. Instead they chose option two, and with downcast faces and hushed voices, they cloaked their vague accusations about us amidst claims of love and care for us. It was then ~~suggested~~ required that this should no longer be talked about.

People were shocked. Some cried. (A few might have been happy.) And everyone wondered what happened to Grace and her husband, "I wonder what they did."

With no actual evidence, we were now guilty in the court of public opinion. Overnight, it was obvious on peoples' faces when we ran into them around town. The lack of detail from the leadership was supposedly to protect us from the shame of whatever scandalous behaviors people were left to imagine.

This effectively dealt with the leadership's problem and furthered their message that everyone better get on board lest the same thing happen to them.

Now that many people have left the CLB, I get to(?) hear the things that they thought or were actually told concerning us. The common thread in all of their stories is that there was never a specific statement of accusation about us, just suspicion implied of our guilt.

For example, at one point my former friend was asked specifically, "What would Grace and her husband say was their reason for leaving?" I think this is a great question, looking for perspective from both sides.

The answer given was, "You wouldn't even believe it if I told you."

That's it! That's all that was said. What is the purpose and result of a statement like that? It implies guilt and scandal.

We weren't the only ones. This has now been used repeatedly to more clearly distinguish who is in/out and to intimidate those still there into not venturing toward the slippery slope of disloyalty.

The fact is that in every situation, the cloud of suspicion is huge in the minds of the people who believe it, while the true accusations are vague and unsubstantiated, even fabricated.

That has been my biggest complaint about the Driscoll message. The accusations about his "friends" are vague and unsubstantiated, relying mostly on the words of other authors to make his case. I mean really, why would we dig around in footnotes in order to prove our friend is questionable?

Surely there is a better way to deal with legitimate disagreement than to feed hyped insinuations to those who wait with sweaty palms hoping the "emerging conversation is coming apart at the seams."

I knew my post yesterday wouldn't be hugely popular, but I felt that it was important. I have since paraphrased it. If you missed it, you might enjoy reading the paraphrased version. It is from a sermon by Dr Isaac Barrow called "The Folly of Slander." Who is it important for?

It is important for me when I would rather take inventory of someone's faults than their strengths.

It is important for the various watchdog-type sites and blogs that want to believe the worst about their brothers in Christ.

It is important in how we view the Driscoll message and others like it that would attempt to judge and critique others in the court of public opinion.

I am not saying that there isn't a place for legitimate public critique and discussion. However, I believe we must ask - are we approaching it with the appropriate charity, justice, and truth required in our treatment of one another?

Calumniate

2007-09-29T09:15:00.000-06:00

"To make maliciously or knowingly false statements about."

There's your dictionary word for the day.

UPDATE: paraphrase added

In case some got bogged down in the old language, I have attempted an interpretation.

From the works of Dr. Isaac Barrow:

Paraphrased

Do they assume a power of playing with, tossing about, and tearing in pieces their neighbor's name, as if it were a mere toy? Do they, with an air of spirituality, backbite their brother?

Is it so common to tear another down, that no one wonders, dislikes, or detests it? But instead those who speak in this manner are heard with pleasure and held in esteem, viewed as a needed voice. This kind of tearing down is no longer seen as a sin, but instead praised as humorous, entertaining, witty, and popular, so that we no longer take ourselves or others to account for what is said.

We might pretend that it is not for personal reasons that we tear down our neighbor, but instead that it is for the sake of orthodox doctrine, for the purity of the truth, the protection of others that we must make our accusations known.

This is the cover of many slanders: zeal for an opinion, although sectarian or factious, motivates whatever is said against others. The cause is of greater importance than the reputations ruined in the process.

The method also is indicative of the motive. The accusations are seldom rendered face to face where one would be accountable for what they are saying.

Accusations are often couched in kind or flattering words in order to make them more credible. Inaccurately misrepresenting someone's words is another way of casting suspicion about them.

Other ways of slandering a person are to outright lie, to accuse them of things they aren't guilty of, to attribute ill motives or intentions to them, to exaggerate their faults, and to link them to evil things of which they themselves aren't actually guilty.

Sly suggestions and covert reflections are what we might call smoke and mirrors. It is to imply guilt without actually saying anything specific. This is done to breed suspicion in the hearers. The list of ways in which this is accomplished is interesting:

wily suppositions - "what if..."
shrewd insinuations - "well, it could be that..."
crafty questions - "did you hear..."
specious comparisons - "it's a bit like..."
intimating a possibility - "I don't know for sure, but..."
inferring some likelihood - "this is what might..."
inducing to believe - "I hate to say it, but..."

The purpose is to suggest guilt and scandal.

It is not only slander to lie, but also to fault-find in order to create damage. Love is not looking for faults and justice would not exaggerate them, because none of us are completely free of fault.

No matter how you try to dress it up...
it is a poison often infused in sweet liquor,
and ministered in a golden cup.

From the works of Dr. Isaac Barrow:

Original
"Do they not usurp a power of playing with, of tossing about, of tearing in pieces their neighbor's good name, as if it were the veriest toy in the world? Do not many "having a form of godliness" (some of them demurely, others confidently, both without any sense of remorse for what they do) backbite their brethern?

Is it not grown so common a thing to asperse causelessly, that no man wonders at it, that few dislike, that scarce any detest it? that most notorious calumniators are heard, not only with patience, but with pleasure; yea are even held in vogue and reverence, as men of notable talent, and very serviceable to their party; so that slander seem to have lost its nature, and not be now an odious sin, but a fashionable humor, a way of pleasing entertainment, a fine knack, or a curious feat of policy; so that no man taketh himself or others to be accountable for what is said in this way?

Perhaps he will pretend it is not to promote his particular concernment, that he makes so bold with his neighbor, or deals so harshly with him; but for the sake of orthodox doctrine, for advantage of the true church, for the advancement of the public good, he judgeth it expedient to asperse him.

This is indeed the covert of innumerable slanders: zeal for some opinion, or some party, beareth out men of sectarian and factious spirits in such practices; they may do, they may say anything for those fine ends. What is a little truth, what is any man's reputation, in comparison to carrying on such brave designs?

Of these passions, the manner of his behavior is a manifest indication; for men do seldom vent their slanderous reports openly and loudly, to the face or in the ear of those who are concerned in them; but do utter them in a low voice, in dark corners, out of sight and hearing, where they can conceit themselves at present safe from being called to an account.

Even commendation itself is used to give passage to dispraises, and render the accusations following more credible, perverting a man's words disadvantageously by affected misconstruction, or a partial and lame discourse of men's discourse and practice.

This is accomplished by bearing false witness, affixing odious characters on persons, which they deserve not, aspersing a man's actions with harsh censure, importing that they proceed from ill principles or tend to bad ends. Also magnifying and aggravating the faults of others, and imputing to our neighbor's practice, evil consequences, apt to render him odious, which have no connexion with them.

Another manner is sly suggestions, through oblique and covert reflexions, one does not directly charge his neighbor with faults, but yet so speaks that he is understood or presumed to do so. Although they do not assert downright falsehoods, yet breed sinister opinions in the hearers, especially in those who from weakness, credulity, jealousy, or prejudice are prone to entertain them. This is done in many ways; by propounding wily suppositions, shrewd insinuations, crafty questions, and specious comparisons, intimating a possibility, or inferring some likelihood of, and thence inducing to believe the fact.

It is not only slander to pick a hole where there is none, but to make that wider which is, so that it appeareth more ugly, and cannot so easily be mended. For charity is wont to extenuate faults, justice doth never exaggerate them, as no man is exempt from some defects, or can live free from some misdemeanors.

Detraction may be couched in truth and clothed in fair language; it is a poison often infused in sweet liquor, and ministered in a golden cup."

Thinking Missionally Video

2007-09-25T14:43:00.000-06:00

Wow! From the beginning, the emerging/missional posters took on a life of their own. It thrills me that they continue to spread the message of the gospel of Jesus that is at the heart of those who consider themselves emerging and/or missional.

Thank you to those who put this video together. Well done!
(ht Christine Sine)

Open Discussion : Convergent Podcast

2007-09-24T06:32:00.000-06:00

I have never tried this before, but I would like to open up discussion in the comment box about the message by Mark Driscoll outlining his concerns with Emergent and specifically with Brian McClaren, Doug Pagitt, and Rob Bell.

The podcast is approximately an hour and a half long. It can be downloaded here from itunes.

The reason I want to do this is because I had mixed feelings after listening to the message, and I am wondering what some of you thought. I will do my best to present a few facts as fairly as I am capable of presenting them, which I am sure is still biased.

I felt Mark's tone started off appropriately humble for the task he was undertaking. He became more bold with his comments as the message progressed.

1. Brian McClaren - Guilt by Reading and Footnoting

Mark is very concerned with Brian's influence from several authors. He spent considerable time explaining the questionable doctrines of the authors that Brian has referenced - Borg, Crossan, Chalke, and Wilbur. Based on Brian's association with these authors, Mark implied that Brian's belief in atonement is questionable.
The other concern that Mark has with Brian is his "increasingly obscure" stand concerning homosexuality based on quotes by Brian in Time Magazine and Christianity Today.

2. Doug Pagitt -

In the "Listening to the Beliefs" book, Doug said, "we should reconsider the idea that there is a necessary distinction between creator and creation." Mark explained that, according to Romans 1, this is by definition paganism and idolatry.
Also when he asked Doug if homosexual practice is incompatible with the christian faith, Doug's response was no.

3. Rob Bell -

Strike One - Brian McClaren covers Rob's pulpit when Rob is gone.
Strike Two - Rob uses rabbinical sources, and the rabbis didn't know or love Jesus.
Strike Three - Trajectory hermeneutic. Based on the "horrible" book - Slaves, Women, and Homosexuals - Mark says that Rob is guilty of theological evolution in arriving at the egalitarian position.
Strike Four - Because of Rob's remark about the virgin birth in the book Velvet Elvis, Mark said that Rob's theological method is frightening.

This is really condensed, but hopefully it is a fair representation of Mark's critique of the 3 men in this podcast.

Near the end Mark made a few general, unsubstantiated statements:

Emergents love Jesus the man, not the God-man.
Emergents are guilty of syncretism, blending Christianity with paganism.
Emergents have a low and diminished view of Scripture.
Finally, those involved in the emerging conversation don't have converts, just the disgruntled children of evanglicalism.

To be fair, there were points in the message when Mark talked about missiology, contextualization, and reaching the world with the message of Jesus, where I could clearly see why he has been so effective in his ministry. He is absolutely sincere about reaching the lost.

Near the end, he made some good points about not erring on either side of the spectrum, syncretism (liberal) or sectarianism (fundamental). He said that we shouldn't be wasting our time fighting over things that don't matter, but rather should be pursuing converts instead of conflict. Amen to that.

If you haven't listened to the podcast, feel free to comment on the ideas I have outlined. If you have listened, I would be very interested in what you thought. Opposing views are welcome. Please be respectful to other commenters.

For Each Other

2007-09-23T14:20:00.000-06:00

The thing that is most frustrating to me concerning the recent message from Mark Driscoll is that prevailing stereotypes and fears concerning the emerging church are being perpetuated.

For those who choose to see emerging-friendly believers in a negative light, this is just more ammo that they can use to solidify their arguments and generalizations. To be honest, I don't think that I will ever understand this stance among believers.

Whatever happened to the idea that we are for each other?

As a mom, sibling rivalry is an issue that I have dealt with a few times. Perhaps selfishness and competition are just human nature. Compassion, empathy, and sharing don't usually seem to come naturally.

I've tried to teach my kids this - when we insist on getting the first, the best, and the most, who is it that we are taking it from? How do we feel about elevating ourselves at our brother or sister's expense?

Of course, our self-interest doesn't end in childhood. So often we see this in couples who are struggling in their marriage. Why are they not for each other? When did they stop being for each other?

If we take an "I'll show him" attitude, we have lost sight of the idea that we should be for each other. In a desire to be right and win, spouses are often willing to cause extreme damage to their relationship and to the person who is supposed to be their lover, friend, partner, and team mate. That is pretty self-defeating in the end, isn't it? What have we won?

But what about when people are against us, when they say things about us or our friends that may not be true?

When it becomes obvious that someone is entrenched in a false opinion about you, it is best to walk away. The energy spent defending yourself against false accusation does not produce good fruit in yourself or anyone else.

I have found this to be true concerning the issue of women in ministry also. It is a frustrating waste of time to argue with someone who is set in their views. The discussions with the anti-emergent crowd appear to be similarly pointless.

In my early months of blogging, I wrote a post called You Can Only Be What You Are. The post is about walking in your gifts without waiting for the permission of others in order to serve.

This was also my mantra when faced with the reality of false accusations and a damaged reputation. What are you going to do? The best strategy is to prove the naysayers wrong with a life well-lived - be what you are.

Kester Brewin did a 5-part series on Game Theory last April. I have referred back to it many times and always planned on linking to it here. I linked to Part 3 since that is where most of the quote is from, however you can page back and forward to read the entire series at his blog. It isn't very long and well worth the read.

I believe these thoughts are appropriate here. He describes the problem of game theory:

"...it turns out that our best strategy is not to trust one another. If we want to win, we need to be selfish."

He then goes on to describe how Christ subverted the game:

"...what Christ is doing when he stays silent at his trial is refusing to even enter the game that the strategists plotting against him have set up. It is as if he deliberately loses, because by losing he is totally subverting the very idea of the game.

On the cross the religious leaders taunted Jesus - if he's so powerful, why doesn't he save himself? This was the final temptation Jesus faced, the same one the devil ended with in the desert: take part in the power play. Jesus emptied himself of all that power, emptied himself of strategies, because he had to be emptied of the Self - the Self that pretends that it is powerful and influential. The Self that pushes the ego forward, rather than looking to the Other.

To give oneself for 'the other' is to lose. It is to be engaged in transformative relationships, rather than tactical change. It is to love. To know grace. And grace and love have no strategy."

Many of us know what it is like to intentionally lose. Perhaps in a game of Candyland or Chutes & Ladders we have lost on purpose, but in the end, we win when we see our child's joy. We have a bigger picture in mind than the game.

I am going to try to remember the bigger picture. We don't have to enter the competition. We can have a strategy to not participate in the power play, a strategy to not defend ourselves, and a strategy to prove our faith with a life that demonstrates the love and grace of Jesus.

A Sunday Proverb

2007-09-23T09:19:00.000-06:00

Some days,
when the whole world seems a little bit off,

you just might
have your contacts in the wrong eyes.

The Emerging Streams Just Got Muddier

2007-09-21T23:27:00.000-06:00

UPDATED

The 3 streams of the emerging church:
1. Guys Mark likes.
2. Mark.
3. Guys Mark doesn't like (his "friends").

Yes, only guys, but that's an issue for another day.

In my reading this evening I came across the fact that Mark Driscoll spoke at a southern baptist conference this weekend. The reports I read so far indicate that Mark has confirmed the southern baptists' fears concerning the emerging church, and maybe thrown a few old friends under the bus.

From conference attendees:

"He talked about how Brian McClaren, Doug Pagitt, Rob Bell are basically sell outs when it comes to Scriptural integrity. He presented a strong case and held nothing back. Interesting stuff. Without a doubt, this is the most direct, I've heard Mark address these issues.

He specifically cited their views on the Atonement, views on homosexuality,rabbinical study, their influences, and theology. There were some very vivid conversations and references to the virgin Mary and McClaren's new organization, "Deep SHIfT"." (Travis Johnson)

"We just witnessed history".
"Mark Driscoll just shared a message unlike anything I have ever experienced.
Mark definitely drew a line in the sand and brought up a lot of inconsistencies with Brian McLaren, Rob Bell, and Doug Pagitt - essentially the Emergent Village and movement." (Clint Carter)

UPDATE:
Driscoll stood up and for an hour and a little more, called out heretics by name. Usually, it’s against my nature to call names and really just speak to the “issues”, which is what Mark had done up until last night. It seems as if the influence of the guys mentioned is simply too great to ignore them as individuals. The guys Driscoll pointed out as teaching false doctrine were Brian McLaren, Doug Pagitt, and Rob Bell. The first two were gimmes. But for a long time, people have lumped Rob Bell in with guys like Jon Burke and Erwin McManus because of style and creativity. It is simply not true. The theology of Bell is completely off base, and Driscoll really dissected it all last night, likening them to the Ebionites of the early church, and to modern-day paganists. (Derek Brown)

UPDATE 2:
I want to include here some wise words from Brother Maynard (at Bill Kinnon's post, Scornucopia) concerning critique. I am not accusing Mark of using scorn in this case, but it appears that his intent is create distance.

"...there is a clear distinction between scorn and critique. The former is to deride and demote, elevating oneself and the views one holds. It creates distance. The latter is to correct what is seen as an errant viewpoint — it is offered with respect and an openness to dialogue about the matter being critiqued in the hope of finding agreement. It closes distance. One is anti-relational, the other is pro-relational...I'm all for critique aimed at closing distance, bringing understanding, and yes, correction as needed."

In discussions of doctrinal difference, at what point is it valid to accuse brothers in Christ of lacking Scriptural integrity, teaching false doctrine, and to label them heretics and paganists?

UPDATE 3:
JD Greear met personally with Mark to discuss the emerging church. On his blog he describes the 3 streams Mark sees in the emerging church.

About the third stream, Mr Grear says:

"The third stream are those who have compromised some of the essential doctrines of the faith. Driscoll mentioned a number of guys--his friends--whom he said, sadly, now were in this stream. They included Brian McLaren, Rob Bell, Tony Jones, Doug Pagitt, and a few others. He cited numerous statements and excerpts from their works that demonstrated that the Gospel has been compromised in their ministries. It's worth at least hearing."

Honestly, if Mark just spelled out doctrinal differences, there is nothing wrong with that. However, it should be done in a manner in which the people hearing the message don't walk away calling the other guy a heretic or false teacher. In other words, if we are going to critique, we should go out of our way to affirm that the brothers we disagree with are as sincere as we are in their love for the Lord and the teaching of Scripture.

Fasten your seat belts folks!

Smug, Spam, Meme, and Links

2007-09-21T08:05:00.000-06:00

Feeling a little smug...
because I fixed our TV yesterday. Yep, even though I know absolutely less than nothing about electronic stuff, I fixed it. The skinny Sanyo that we bought a year and half ago quit working last month.

Moving through the stages of grief, we first just kept turning the TV on every once in a while to see if maybe it would work. Then we were angry that it broke so soon (new-fangled crap these days!). We considered the possibility of getting it fixed. Then we started sitting together sullenly in our living room just wishing we could watch our favorite shows or a movie together. Finally, we moved a 20-year-old 12" television in to replace the shiny newer TV. It was really pathetic. Sadly, the nice TV was headed for the trash. We accepted that we were going to have to buy a new one.

In a moment of last-ditch desperation, I took apart the TV, removed 14 screws and took a look inside. One little thingy looked loose, so my assistant snugged it into place. We hooked up the power and voila!!! TV works.

Moral of the story, hmmm....
Don't throw something away without at least trying to fix it.
If you own it, you are allowed to take it apart.
Sometimes you can fix stuff even when you don't know what you are doing.

(Warning: It doesn't always work, and sometimes you can make things worse. It recently did work with my vacuum cleaner and the TV, but not with my washing machine.)

Blogrush
Cuz everybody's doing it!

My apologies to those of you I spammed with this, but I was just passing along the love from Brother Maynard, and I was fortunate enough to discover your email address.

It might be a good thing, and if so, you will be glad that you got in on the ground floor. Speaking of, are you open to a business opportunity? Just kidding.

Discipleship Meme
Erin kindly tagged me this week in a discipleship meme. As I said on her blog, I believe that there is a mutuality of discipleship that happens in the blogosphere as we share and learn from one another. I certainly appreciate the friendship, mentoring, and teaching that I receive from my blog friends.

As I considered which blog people I follow, a few people came to mind. I know these guys will be all 'aw shucks' about being mentioned, but whatever...

I consider Robbymac a brother/mentor. Fortunately, I met him fairly early in my blog life, and I value his steady encouragement and wisdom.

I look to John Frye as a radical pastor/elder. When I see the heart, wisdom, and knowledge of God that is reflected in John's writing, I know that he is someone to listen and learn from.

Wayne Jacobsen isn't someone that I know, even online. However he is someone that I follow. I aspire to absorb his understanding of how to live freely in our relationship with the Father, and to become the kind of a person that inspires that in others.

I am also blessed with real life people who serve as friends, elders, and mentors to me, who speak into my life and model an authentic, vital walk with the Lord.

A Few Links
Brother Maynard has a cool message from Bob Dylan on his blog.

In case you missed it, Robbymac is channeling CS Lewis.

Jeff Greathouse did an awesome post entitled Collapse of the Church Culture.

Alan Knox is doing a not-to-be-missed series this week on elders.

Family Life
Quote from my husband to me this week while talking about the kids:

"There is a lot that happens around here that you don't notice. That's why you're so happy."

What the heck? At least he was laughing when he said it.

Embodiment

2007-09-19T13:51:00.000-06:00

Warning, this will be a long post, but it will likely be my only post this week, so save it for when you have a few minutes and a cup of coffee.

I wanted these thoughts compiled in one place for my own consideration. It seems like everywhere I turn lately, I am being drawn to incarnation, the idea that we are sent by God.

Again Jesus said, "Peace (shalom, wholeness) be with you! As the Father has sent me, I am sending you." And with that he breathed on them and said, "Receive the Holy Spirit." (John 20:21-22)

So how did the Father send Jesus?

"...beginning in Galilee after the baptism that John preached— how God anointed Jesus of Nazareth with the Holy Spirit and power, and how he went around doing good and healing all who were under the power of the devil, because God was with him." (Acts 10:37-38)

And how did Jesus send us?

"But you will receive power when the Holy Spirit comes on you; and you will be my witnesses in Jerusalem, and in all Judea and Samaria, and to the ends of the earth." (Acts 1:8)

"But when he, the Spirit of truth, comes, he will guide you into all truth. He will not speak on his own; he will speak only what he hears, and he will tell you what is yet to come. He will bring glory to me by taking from what is mine and making it known to you. All that belongs to the Father is mine. That is why I said the Spirit will take from what is mine and make it known to you." (John 16:13-15)

The Holy Spirit is our witness to the resurrection and reign of Christ. He enables us to see and know the kingdom dimension.

John Frye speaks about this in his post I Brought You My Son.

He opens with...

"The church is the presence of Jesus in the world. Let's think about that."

And the heart of what he is saying...

"Oneness with Jesus and the Father...that the world may believe that the Father has sent Jesus. That reality is about us--the church."

A few verses I have added that emphasize what John is saying...

"On that day (when you receive the Spirit) you will realize that I am in my Father, and you are in me, and I am in you." (John 14:20)

"For in Christ all the fullness of the Deity lives in bodily form, and you have been given fullness in Christ." (Col.2:9-10)

This post by Jason Zahariades, Defining Incarnational, was an important post for me because it moved my understanding of incarnational beyond the idea of sentness and into the realm of embodiment.

About simply defining incarnational as being sent, Jason says...

"However, I think this is a truncated and perhaps even a distorted view of incarnational. To incarnate means to embody."

A couple of other thoughts from his post...

"...participating in God's mission requires doing so in his character. God's mission is carried forward by his stewards as we embody his character."

"Growing into the likeness of Christ is the core of our participation in God's mission. Without that, missional activity is simply activity."

Jason's thoughts emphasize the importance of God's redemptive process being an increasing reality in our personal lives, that Christ's nature and character be the substance of what we embody. As we pursue the mission of God's reconciliation to the world, it is vital that we also pursue God's restoration to wholeness in our own lives, that His reign increases in the territory of our hearts as well.

It is through embracing the transforming power of His Spirit in our lives that we participate in His divine nature, that we incarnate His life and nature.

"His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness. Through these he has given us his very great and precious promises, so that through them you may participate in the divine nature." (2Peter1:3-4)

John Santic recently posted a 3-part series on incarnation entitled The Church Moves Into the Neighborhood.

Several good points from his series...

"This must cause the church to move beyond trying to rationalize faith (as it so often does) according to the scientific principles of modernity, and begin to live and breath the resurrection as a result of being in Christ. We must embody the resurrection in historical word and deed following in the footsteps of Jesus."

"To live out of a hermeneutic of love is the invitation knocking on the door of the church in the West."

"Jesus “…is not about ‘soul-making’, the attempt to produce or train disembodied beings for a future disembodied life."

"...the lack of a robust Jesus has dimmed her (the church's) understanding of vocation to a point where discipleship has been neglected."

Picking up on this theme of discipleship is Brother Maynard's post, Monastic Discipleship, Spiritual Formation...and the Jedi.

This post furthered my thinking about how we impart and share the life and nature of Christ with one another and with the lost. We seem to have lost true discipleship in our formulaic and programmatic approaches to learning in the church. (On a side note, I think this is at the root of our questions about what to do with the children.) Brother Maynard suggests a more holistic, organic approach which I believe is deeply connected to our understanding of incarnation.

"We live it out, in all of life — we live our faith. We follow our Master, Christ, after whose pattern we are gradually formed. It’s a lifelong process, so we do not expect a quick-fix but are willing to invest in ourselves and in others, to be involved in their lives. To share our own life with them."

Alan Hirsch's links the idea of embodiment to discipleship in his post Passing the Baton.

"When we try to translate this idea of embodiment in terms of missional strategy as to how we impact people with the Gospel, it will mean that we ourselves must become a substantial representation of what for many outside of Christ is an otherwise rather nebulous theory. This concept is therefore not just existentially significant for an authentic life, and it is that, it is absolutely crucial both for the transmission of the Gospel beyond ourselves, and for the initiating and survival of missional movements. It is critical to the authenticity and vitality of the Church’s mission."

One of the Scriptures he includes that demonstrates this kind of patterning and modeling is I Thessalonians 1:5-6:

"...because our gospel came to you not simply with words, but also with power, with the Holy Spirit and with deep conviction. You know how we lived among you for your sake. You became imitators of us and of the Lord; in spite of severe suffering, you welcomed the message with the joy given by the Holy Spirit."

I hope these thoughts from Scripture and the writing of others adds depth and color to your picture of what it means to be incarnational.

A final thought...

I used to skim over the greetings and benedictions in the epistles, but I have recently come to really appreciate them. It seems that the apostles took the opportunity in their greetings to remind people in a few short powerful sentences of who they are and what God's purpose is for them. One of my favorites, which I believe captures the idea of incarnation and embodiment is Ephesians 3:16-19.

So I will close with this prayer for all of us as we seek to truly live incarnational lives.

"I pray that out of his glorious riches
he may strengthen you with power
through his Spirit in your inner being,
so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith.

And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love,
may have power, together with all the saints,
to grasp how wide and long and high and deep
is the love of Christ,
and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—
that you may be filled to the measure
of all the fullness of God."

Go Ahead God, Mess it Up

2007-09-16T07:15:00.001-06:00

Clear words, resonating in my ears and my mind as I stumbled out of bed after a long night of vivid, yet disjointed dreams.

I made my way to the computer and wrote them down while still in the haze of sleep. I tried to piece together the scenes and stories that led up to the declaration, but could only grasp bits and pieces without the vivid clarity they had during the night.

I went in search of some caffeine, and sat down to skim through my bloglines. By then, I had already forgotten the phrase, so I was thankful to have written it down.

What were those dreams? A wedding called off at the last minute, a beautiful motel destroyed by fire, a commercial real estate deal that bombed at closing.

The wedding prep was beautiful, gorgeous cakes, sparkly people, beautiful bride. The motel was amazing, luxurious, a jewel in the community. The real estate deal would have been profitable.

Our plans, our kingdoms...

What about my plans, my kingdom?

Go ahead God, mess it up.

Big Rock Stars

2007-09-14T07:07:00.001-06:00

The other day I was dozing off on the couch while reading a book that a friend gave me to read which I admit was a little radical, even for me.

One of the slightly annoying things about having teenagers in the house is that they have this tendency to walk into a room, turn the radio on loud to a station they like, and then leave the room.

So with Nickelback playing in the background, I dozed off thinking about some thoughts from this book...

"A church organization nearly always takes on an existence of its own and begins to exist for its own sake."

"The institution makes us feel safe, secure, and sufficient. It gives us status, position, reputation, security, and identity."

"They turn a fellowship of believers into a business. Like corporations, they are management-based, profit-oriented, success-driven, client-friendly, program-focused, image-concious, and headed by a charismatic personality."

"Paul illustrated that all members of the body have a function. Nowhere does he remotely suggest that we are to get a private, non-profit corporation, name it, and solicit funds for it so we can be who we are in the body of Christ."

"The one with a ministry feels obligated to set up the playground in which we can play church, so that he can lead the rest of us in playing church."

"If the minister does not see himself as one among the bride of Christ, he will rape the bride by using her to increase himself."

"...these are the shepherds who seek to increase themselves in power, position, riches, and domination at the expense of the saints."

"Preeminence is that air of self-importance that makes them want to be top dog in the system, to sit on the platform in bishop's chairs, marking a difference between them and the people."

"They are preoccupied with building a kingdom for self rather than building the Kingdom of God. They build church systems and church buildings rather than people. Worse yet, they confuse the one for the other."

Like I said, a little radical.

However, now I have this weird mental connection going on between the song Big Rock Stars and some of the things I read and hear about church.

My husband was talking about the ~~boss~~ apostle from our CLB developing his ~~pyramid~~ network of churches and his plan for soliciting ~~protection money~~ support, and suddenly this tune was playing in my head...

"Cause we all just wanna be big rockstars
live in hilltop houses, driving 15 cars..."

It doesn't get any better when I get on the internet and read blogs. At this point, I could give you 100's of links to excesses and abuses within the church that I've read about just this week. Do I really need to? You know what I'm talking about.

"And we'll hide out in the private rooms
With the latest dictionary and
today's who's who
They'll get you anything
with that evil smile
Everybody's got a
~~drug dealer~~ publisher on speed dial
Hey hey I wanna be a rockstar..."

When I read of extravagance and entitlement, I hear this song. When I read of self-importance, celebrity pastors, and one-man-show mega-ministries, I hear this song.

"Well we all just wanna be big rockstars
Live in hilltop houses driving 15 cars..."

Then I read the stories of those who have chosen a different path, who have chosen a journey toward insignificance and service, and I am encouraged that not everyone wants to be a big rock star. Many of these heroes are in my blogreader.

I know that we all get discouraged at times. We struggle with embracing an opposite value, living under the world's judgment that we really are insignificant, fighting our own demons of both insecurity and pride.

Yesterday, in his post I'm Okay With Small, Dan included this story about a little boy and a starfish. I had not heard the story before. It was encouraging to me, so I would like to share it with you. Be sure to read Dan's post also. You will be blessed.

"A person was walking the beach one morning and noticed a boy bending down, picking something up, and throwing it into the ocean as far as he could. Over and over he did it.

As the observer came closer he saw thousands of starfish the tide had brought onto the beach. The tide had receded and they would eventually die, so the boy was throwing them back into the water - one at a time.

The man finally says, "Son, there must be thousands of starfish. You'll never be able to get to all of them. You can't possibly make a difference."

The boy smiled and continued to pick up another starfish and toss it into the water. "It made a difference for that one," he replied."

Missional Guinea Pig

2007-09-13T07:07:00.000-06:00

In the midst of all the high-level discussion of being missional, the writing of books, and the advancing of ideas among church leaders and seminarians, I sift through a lot of information to find those who are breaking it down to the level where I live.

Personally, I sometimes feel like a case study in converting from traditional church attender to becoming a missional follower of Christ, a missional guinea pig, if you will.

In my case, we have a fairly mature believer, sincere relationship with the Lord, commitment to obedience, somewhat intelligent, and thoroughly trained in churchianity.

Then there was the damascus road experience, where the blinders came off, and I was introduced to the ideas of missional and incarnational living. Some of you might be able to relate to what an awkward transition this is.

As I sat in church Sunday, listening to the recount of the past year's ministry - 200 decisions, multiple baptisms, lives and families changed - I wondered about my fumbling attempts to live missionally.

I looked at my personal ineffectiveness and toyed with the temptation to let someone else do it, to attach myself to something delivering quantifiable results, to become involved to the point that I could take credit for some of the fruit. I mean really, why reinvent the wheel?

"Honey did you buy some cookies at the missionary bake sale?" Check.

"...and drop off those clothes at goodwill?" Check.

"Are we signed up for small group, women's bible study, men's accountability group, kid's in youth group, volunteering at Sunday school and the church clean-up day?"

Check, check, check.

Sometimes I consider this, but then I wonder if it would be backsliding.

Losing the Training Wheels

2007-09-12T08:40:00.000-06:00

Or in other words, what I am thinking about today...

One of the things that I love about the blogosphere is finding others who have put into words thoughts and ideas that I am attempting to grasp. Today, I would like to pull together a few of those thoughts from others that are contributing to my understanding of being missional.

In processing Brother Maynard's extensive thoughts on being missional, one of the points that really struck me was the idea that being missional is an individual response. It is not something to be delegated. It is not a stylistic approach or an add-on program to the way we do church, even in emerging/missional churches.

Allow me to quote some of his phrases concerning this, and please refer back to his post Understanding Missional for the entire context of these quotes.

Individual missional response:
"To be truly missional though, a church would “send” everyone to live incarnationally."

"The missional imperative or universal mandate does not delegate well. Every believer is already among those to whom they are sent..."

"This individual response is for me an essential aspect of what it means to be missional."

"Since missional engagement is a personal response by a believer to the Missio Dei, any one believer can act missionally."

A corporate expression of mission:
"As such, any definition of missional which requires a program or a host organization is at odds with the ways in which I use the word."

"When the mandate is viewed as primarily a corporate one, delegation of its fulfillment is possible…"

"...the effort is delegated and paid for from the common church coffers. It becomes the duty of some to fill the coffers, and the duty of others to do the work with support from the coffers."

Along those lines, Bob Roberts, in his post What is Missional?, talks about the tendency to compartmentalize missions into organizational, programmatic activity.

"We didn’t mean to, but over the years we have compartmentlized missions–and it’s a huge mistake. It slows down and impedes the Great Commission. We’ve comparmentalized it as one of the many important things a church does. We’ve compartmentalized it organizationally and institutionally apart from the whole. The beauty of the Kingdom is it’s impossible to compartmentalize it. It’s the esssense of all of it. It’s the life, Kingdom in, which leads to personal transformation, and then the ministry, Kingdom out, which leads to community, family, and “other” transformation."

Alan Knox describes this tendency to compartmentalize and delegate in his post, Am I Against Church Programs? Again, it would be valuable to read these quotes in the context of the entire post.

"These programs and traditions, while probably started in order to help believers keep the commands of God, tend to replace the commands of God - either consciously or unconsciously - in the minds of the believers.

...furthermore, attendance or participation neither equates with obedience nor do they preclude the individual's responsibility."

Alan goes on to quote his friend Eric from Hammer and Nail:

"I think one reason people outside the church may not see a living faith within the church is that we often rely on church programs to accomplish the work the individuals should be doing...Programs, whether good or not so good, often lead people into shirking their personal responsibility to serve others by thinking that the church program will take care of it."

Sonja adds this in the comment thread of that post:

"...in many respects the church has become very like the state. We have come to rely on church programs to take care of things in much the way that we rely on state program to take care of things...individuals shirk their responsibility to "love their neighbor" by giving to the church and hoping the church will handle the messiness of it all."

To be clear, I am not suggesting an individualistic Christian walk. I am however saying that we each bear a personal responsibility in fulfilling the missional mandate. Being missional requires removing ourselves from the dualistic mentality of church activity versus missional activity. Missional living is a part of our everyday lifestyle rather than something we append, attend, or attach to our life in a progammatic way.

Building + Attendance = Church

2007-09-06T05:58:00.001-06:00

Right?

You all provided some great advice and encouragement in my previous post, I Want Some Answers. An anonymous poster has come in at the end with the solution. I do not normally single out comments, but since there is not a link back to this person, I will allow their comment to represent anyone who might quip this little tidbit of advice:

In my humble opinion you should quit forsaking the assembling of yourself from local church life and get back involved.

I know what most church people mean when they spout this phrase. In fact, to be honest, I may have spouted it a time or two, although this wasn't one of my personal soapboxes.

I am having a little trouble with the intended definitions of the three phrases in this sentence - quit forsaking the assembling of yourself, local church life, and get back involved. Let's talk about this.

Quit forsaking the assembling of yourself
Typically a person saying this is referring to Sunday morning attendance at a particular church organization.

For the record, I attend church most Sundays.

We like to get together with other believers during the week also. Sometimes it is a larger group and involves worshiping, sharing, and praying for one another. Sometimes it is only another couple or just a friend and might only involve food, coffee, and conversation.

Of course, none of this is church. Often the people we assemble with are not members of the same local organization, and the meetings are not established programs of a particular local institution.

Local church life
This phrase would define which church and which activities? I know, you are supposed to pick a team. No free agents allowed. It was so much easier when I thought we were on the best team.

Now I look around and see so many wonderful brothers and sisters in Christ, but they are not all in the same building. Some of them are housechurching, others are at various churches around town.

Is church life what happens within the walls? Is there church life outside of the walls?

Get back involved
When I hear this, I hear someone telling me to once again embrace a church-centered existence. The routine is spelled out - attend the membership classes, join a small group, volunteer for service in the programs.

Been there, done that. What it produced in my life was a busy schedule. I had to check my calendar to find time for people. It was filled with appointments, classes, and meetings - important sounding leadership things. In fact, I was involved in organizing the church calendar to make sure that everyone else was busy with meetings too.

No thanks. I am trying to learn how to be involved in everyday, real-life ways with normal people unrelated to church programs and activities. As I said earlier, I still gather frequently with believers. That is easy for me, and I enjoy it.

It is not easy or natural for me to develop relationships with people unrelated to church. In fact, if I make myself busy enough with church stuff, I could avoid doing this.

There is still a part of me that would love to embrace the cocoon of a church-centered life once again, but dang it, I think it might even be God who messed up this cozy part of my life. And He seems to be the one who keeps pushing me towards being the church in a different way.

What say you?

Transition

2007-09-04T06:17:00.002-06:00

Perhaps it is related to the season and time of year, with summer quickly turning into fall, the beginning of a new school year, and the first day of work in September.

As we headed into last weekend, I had a sense of anticipation, a feeling that after Sunday, things would change. I felt like it was a corner - a point where our direction would turn. After processing our thoughts and feelings about the weekend, the net result is something different than I expected.

There is this overwhelming feeling that it is "the end." The end of what, I'm not sure. It is a bit difficult to describe because it is a strong feeling/sensing rather than a factual knowing. I had not mentioned the thought of turning a corner to my husband, but yesterday it was obvious to both of us that something had shifted.

In a journey of liminality, a change of direction is not necessarily meaningful. You still don't know where you are going.

This quote from Graham Cooke was encouraging to me today:

"When we live from the inner man of the spirit, we detect nuances, like a sailor detecting subtle shifts in the wind, or a farmer the smell of early rain. These signs of change cause us to reflect and move closer to the person of God through prayer and worship. We begin to ask for grace and wisdom because we feel something is changing. Our early warning system is working."

This is what I am sensing, that it is time to move in closer to God and listen for His direction for the season we are entering.

I Want Some Answers

2007-08-29T11:56:00.002-06:00

I have been pretty patient about this whole transition thing for quite a while now. The time that has passed has been useful and necessary for healing and detox.

However, these are important years for us and our family. I am upset with what my kids know and have seen about church over the last few years. You cannot keep secrets from teenagers. They pick up on everything.

We have done a good job of raising kids that are not religious. Their BS detectors are keen to legalism and hype. But have we done enough to ignite their passion for the things of God? or have we leaked too much cynicism, drowning out that spark?

In the meantime, I have been waiting, trusting that God would show us what's next. I'm getting a little tired of waiting.

Clearance Sale on Intercession Books

2007-08-27T01:00:00.000-06:00

Prayer Synchroblog

I need more bookshelves in my house. In our main living area, I only have a small bookshelf that holds about 60 books. In my basement office/store room I have more bookshelves, where I keep quite a few other books.

Over time, it seems like books begin accumulating in piles around the house - quite a few on my nightstand, some near the sofas, little stacks here and there, handy to grab and read.

About once a year, I do the book shuffle. During the book shuffle, the books I am currently most interested in go in the little bookshelf. This means that some books that were on the bookshelf get demoted to the basement.

Yesterday I took 22 books on prayer down to the basement. They will join another dozen or more books about prayer. With all these books, I must have the prayer thing down, right?

Actually, it has always been something that I wish I were better at. Surely one of those books has the key to effective prayer so that I could feel like I'm really doing it right. So why are the books headed to the basement?

Most of the titles were some combination of the words Power, Prayer, Keys, Secret, Prophetic, Effective, and Intercession. They are good books, but leave me feeling like I have to pray well in order for God to hear me.

I don't think the point of prayer is about what I say or how I say it. I don't think that God needs me to pray a certain way. I know that the Father already knows my needs before I pray. In fact, I don't think that God needs me to pray at all.

But I need to pray. And I need to worship. Apparently my memory is short, because I need to continually remind myself of the goodness and faithfulness of God, and I need to frequently remember to submit my heart to Him.

So how do I pray? Mostly informally and spontaneously.

When I have quiet time, I like to put on a worship CD and spend time in the Lord's presence, mostly just listening for Him.

I pray at random times throughout the day. If I'm out walking alone, I usually pray. Quite often I pray in my van. As things come up during the day, I will pray. I try to pray right away if possible when I feel the need to pray for someone or something so that I won't forget. I usually drift off to sleep at the end of the day while praying.

Frequently, I find myself praying the Lord's prayer, or at least starting out there. I love praying "thy kingdom come" and applying it to situations. Other than that, my prayers are mostly conversational, sharing my thoughts or worries with the Lord, usually praying in the Spirit also.

Prayer is important to me. Spending time talking with God helps me get perspective. Just a few moments with Him can center and balance me, whereas hours of pondering or fretting leaves my thoughts spinning in circles. Just a word from Him, spoken to my heart, really is like bread to sustain me or like water to quench my thirst.

I admire people with flowery sounding prayers. There is something to be said for those who pray well, who know the bases that need to be covered, and who somehow manage to address all of the angles.

I don't like praying publicly now. My prayers are too simplistic. I seem to have forgotten the good prayer lingo. I don't really need it when it's just me and God, but I sometimes feel like I ought to have something fancier to pull out for other folks.

I'm still learning to pray, but for now I'm going to put away the books and let the Holy Spirit be my Teacher. What I say in prayer is not as important as what I hear in prayer.

You Might Be Missional If...

2007-08-26T12:53:00.000-06:00

Don't miss this list by Larry Chouinard at Spiritual Conversations. Larry doesn't post very often, but everything he posts is worth reading.

My favorite, #12:

12. You've wanted to close a 'service' by shouting from your pew, "NOW WHAT?"

Just One More

2007-08-21T15:11:00.000-06:00

Dedicated to

all of the men who do not believe that women share equal standing in the kingdom of God

and to

all of the women who know they do.

Personality Roundup

2007-08-19T11:04:00.000-06:00

UPDATE: I will do the final update on the list this evening (Tuesday, the 21st), so if you want to be included, put your type in the comments today.

Many of you have taken the personality quiz that's been going around lately and have seen the lists of famous people with your personality type. I thought you might be interested in seeing lists of fellow bloggers and their personality types. Obviously, this isn't a complete list, just a few of the bloggers in my bloghood who have recently posted their type.

Erin is conducting a poll at her site on personality types, so be sure to stop by her place and cast your vote.

The ENTJs should probably be at the top, The Chief or Field Marshal:
ENTJs are bound to lead others, and from an early age they can be observed taking command of groups.
Jeff Greathouse

Next the INTJs, The Strategist or Mastermind:
"INTJs apply the criterion "Does it work?" to everything."
Me
Makeesha (another girl INTJ!)
Susan Barnes
Ronni
Jamie Arpin Ricci
Michael Kruse
Dan H.
Andy M.
Mike Clawson
John LaGrou
Patrick O.

Interesting FAQs:
Q. Is there a difference between male and female INTJs?
A. The only difference between male and female INTJs is that the females get more flack for their INTJ tendencies.
Q. Are female INTJs less feminine than women of other temperaments?
A. Female INTJs are just as feminine as they want to be. They can be as sweet as the next woman if they feel like it. They are just opinionated and don't put up with stupidity for long.

Closely related, the INTP, The Engineer or Architect:
INTPs have the ability to analyze difficult problems, identify patterns, and come up with logical explanations. They seek clarity in everything, and are therefore driven to build knowledge.
Brother Maynard
Joy

Next, an ENTP, The Originator or Inventor:
ENTPs are idea people. Their perceptive abilities cause them to see possibilities everywhere.
Leighton Tebay

A couple of my favorite ISTJs, The Examiner or Inspector:
ISTJs are responsible, loyal and hard working. They are dedicated to everything they do and are very dependable.
Mary
Cindy
Barb
Barry
Lauren C.

Similarly, the ESTJs, The Overseer or Supervisor:
ESTJs make sure that everything is running smoothly and systematically. They honor traditions and laws.
Malegra

Leading the polls so far, the INFPs, The Dreamer or Healer:
INFPs are introspective, private, creative and highly idealistic individuals that have a constant desire to be on a meaningful path. They often have a talent for language and writing. I'm glad that I know so many INFPs!
Bill Kinnon
Lyn
Sonya
Erin
Julie
Ron Cole
Barbara
Scott M.
Maria
Che Vachon
David Fisher
Jake Meador

A more outgoing version, ENFPs, The Advocate or Champion:
ENFPs function as catalysts. Their leadership style is one of soliciting and recognizing others' contributions and of evaluating the personal needs of their followers. This is the kind of leadership the church needs.
Robbymac
Randy McRoberts
Jeff Smith (If you don't know Jeff, be sure to visit his blog.)
Steve Sensenig
Daisymarie
Alan Knox
Fr'nklin
Kathryn
Steve Cochenour
Jonathan Brink

The ENFJs, The Mentor or Teacher:
ENFJs are focused on understanding, supporting, and encouraging others. They make things happen for people, and get personal satisfaction from this.
My husband
BJ
Amber

A little quieter, the INFJs, The Confidant or Counselor:
INFJs are introspective, caring, sensitive, gentle and complex people that strive for peace and derive satisfaction from helping others.
Deirdre

In a class by herself, ESTP, The Persuader or Promoter:
Enthusiastic and excitable, ESTPs are doers who live in the world of action.
Heather

Next, an ISTP, The Craftsman:
ISTPs like to figure out how things work. They have great mechanical and technical skills.
Carrie

If you want, I will update the list and add you to it. Just let me know your type in the comments, or if you post your results, I will link to your test.

Is Jesus My Imaginary Friend?

2007-08-17T10:09:00.000-06:00

Because I read so many blogs about faith and religion, I often come across discussions about the best way to prove one's faith, debating knowledge and theological points of view. To be honest, I usually find these discussions to be very clinical, and the picture of God being portrayed too narrow and rigid. Although I am very logical, I don't relate with God through my intellect.

I don't have much interest in trying to prove my faith to others, even unbelievers. Yes, I know I'm going to have to turn in my good evangelical badge. The typical guilt trip is that if I love the other person enough, I would be driven to pound them over the head with the gospel until they get it, lest they die in a car accident tonight and their blood is eternally on my hands. Geesh, that's a lot of responsibility to carry.

This is a comment I made at Sonja's blog on her post Losing My Religion:

"Why do I still have faith? I have faith in the person of God and His love. I know the One who whispers to my heart and somehow communicates with the depths of my soul, and I trust Him.

I don’t believe that I could hang onto an empty set of beliefs and arguments without experiencing knowing God. At the end of the day, many questions may remain, but I don’t question that He is real and that He loves me."

Our testimony is not our conversion story, our testimony is our understanding of who God is, testifying of how we have personally known God, who He is to us. Can I prove that I know God? My only proof is experiential, although to me it is more real than our current reality.

I question if we can really convince someone about God simply from the proof of Scriptures. Scripture can open someone's heart to receive understanding about God, but it seems to me, that in order to have a real faith, someone must experience meeting the person of God and knowing Him.

I'm not saying that Scripture is unimportant, but I believe we must first have a revelation of the person of God. That is a work of the Spirit, not the intellect. From there, having come to know God, we then build our understanding of scripture and theology. I believe the greatest revelation, understanding, and knowledge we will ever have is of the truth of God's love.

At the Forgotten Ways blog, Alan says, "The original meaning of the Hebrew verb ‘”to recognise, to know,” in distinction from Western languages, belongs not to the sphere of reflection but to that of personal contact." He then provides this quote:

"The decisive event for ‘knowing’ in Biblical Hebrew is not that one looks at an object, but that one comes into touch with it. This basic difference is developed in the realm of a relation of the soul to other beings, where the fact of mutuality changes everything. At the centre is not a perceiving of one another, but a contact of being – intercourse.. This theme of ‘knowing’ intercourse rises to a remarkable and incomparable height in the relation of God to those He has chosen." (Martin Buber, Good and Evil)

Let me close with this amazing short video of Brennan Manning (ht to Jonathan Brink).

"I dare you to trust that I love you just as you are, not as you should be." - Jesus

"I'm Gonna Need A Bigger Crowbar"

2007-08-13T08:28:00.000-06:00

We are knee deep in another remodeling project. This time we are remodeling the kids' bathroom. This is our third (and final) bathroom remodel for this house. Except for the tub/shower, we are replacing everything - toilet, vanity, flooring, cabinets and lighting. As usual for us, this is a do-it-yourself project.

We have our roles down pretty well. I'm in charge of demolition, planning, purchasing, and painting. My husband is in charge of electrical, plumbing, sheet rock, and flooring. We work together on installing cabinets.

While working on the demolition I had a few random thoughts about deconstruction.

1. It starts with a desire for something new, something different than what you've had.

2. It is messy. Things look unfinished and broken for awhile.

3. Your routines are disrupted. Everyone has to adapt to the changes whether they like it or not.

4. Sometimes it is hard to fully envision something new until the old has been cleared away.

5. Longstanding dysfunction becomes more apparent once you begin the process of deconstruction. We have said so often, "I can't believe we've been putting up with this. Why didn't we change it sooner." However, it is sometimes hard to see the things you are putting up with.

6. Trying to hang onto something old sometimes becomes a hindrance to accomplishing the new. Quite often it is easier and a better result to put in something new than to try to make the old thing work.

7. Plans have to be flexible. Sometimes the plan you start out with has to be adapted for the circumstances you encounter.

MPD - More Personality Discussion

2007-08-10T08:04:00.001-06:00

I have seen this personality test showing up a few places around the blogosphere (ht to Heather). I enjoyed taking a test with different questions than those on the Jung-style test I've taken before.

Usually I test as an INTJ, although my results are not often definitive on most personality/gifts tests. As you can see from the graph, I am borderline I/E, N/S, and J/P having a 47/53 split on all three. The only one with a significantly clear result is the T, thinking. I am married to a high-scoring Feeler. (ENFJ)

As to the introvert/extrovert, I am energized by being around people and rejuvenated by being alone. I love both solitude and good conversation. Although I am more social than my husband, he usually scores higher as an extrovert because he is much more forward in approaching strangers.

The multiple intelligence test is an accurate description of me. I always score highest in mathematical intelligence on IQ tests. As the test shows, I am verbal (mostly in writing), relational, and self aware.

It is apparent and true that I am not especially athletic, musical, or outdoorsy. I used to play piano at an intermediate level, but only by reading music. PE was always my least favorite class in both high school and college, and the only class where the teachers didn't like me. I still think it's a good idea to duck if a ball is flying towards you. The badge doesn't show naturalist at the bottom of the graph at 20%.

I have wondered about having a second career. I have a degree in accounting. Even though I'm good at it, I don't really like accounting. What do you think might be a good career for a highly relational mathematician? (Is that an oxymoron?)

What a Week!

2007-08-08T17:15:00.001-06:00

Well, I didn't see that one coming.

I have occasionally visited the team pyro site and other similar sites in an attempt to understand their point of view. I have come to realize that, in spite of the fact that we are all in Christ, we do not agree in our perceptions of what God is like.

I find the strident tone of the conversations at some sites draining rather than life-giving. Therefore I prefer to spend my time at blogs that inspire and encourage me in my spiritual walk. And that's okay! There are zillions of blogs to select from, and I can't read them all.

When I came across the posters at team pyro, I was neither hurt nor angry. Rather the posters confirmed that their opinion of emerging/missional thought is well-established in their minds. When the writers at pyro made the posters, they wrote their honest thoughts concerning each of the topics.

The difference in the two sets of posters portrays a clear example of word association. With the same word, they hear one thing, I hear another. That is what triggered the inspiration to create my own posters. The same 20 words inspire entirely different thoughts in my mind than what was portrayed in the team pyro posters.

Honestly, I think it boils down to a matter of choice or preference. If you want the words to be meaningful, they can be. If you reject them as associated with something you oppose, then the words will invoke thoughts of opposition.

My posters are the result of what happens when you take a little spare time, a little inspiration, and a husband out of town for the weekend. I took each of the words, and in true word-association style, wrote down the first thought that came to mind about each of the words.

After the posters went hugely public, I was left to disclaim that they were not Official Trademarked Emergent-Approved Definitive explanations of the terms. Good grief, if I had known more than 50 people would see them, I might have put a little more thought into it. However, in the end, I think the word-association method is appropriate.

There have been over 100 links to the posters. Many of the early links came from my friends, and many people have written awesome posts about the two sets of posters. I tried to follow as many of the other links as I could and have added several interesting blogs to my blogreader.

Of course, not everyone likes me or the posters. Oh well. One of my favorite critiques is that they were overly positive. We certainly wouldn't want to be too positive about Jesus, the gospel, or salvation now, would we? And apparently Phil Johnson has accused me of being..... ...........sweet. I'm crushed!

As to my motives, both sides have given me too much credit. My intent was neither especially gracious nor malicious. They certainly were not a "back at ya" to team pyro. They were not a well-thought-out plan to make team pyro look mean. And in case anyone is worried that I might be too nice, they were not even a prayerful response to ridicule.

They were simply me expressing myself with little forethought to the results. I didn't realize that I had stepped into or inadvertently created a poster war. It caught me by surprise to suddenly be expected to defend the emerging movement and perhaps all of christianity.

My first reaction to some of the more harshly toned comments was, "Hey, what did I ever do to you?" It still surprises me when someone who knows nothing about me shows up with strong accusations. I don't understand approaching a conversation that way. It seems like a better approach would be to share your own point of view rather than attacking a stranger's point of view.

As for this blog, those of you who have been around know that things are pretty civil around here. We have had some great insightful conversations in the past. Agreement is certainly not a requirement, but for the most part, people share what they have to say in a sincere and respectful manner.

If you're new around here, I would love the chance to get to know you. Feel free to introduce yourself in the comment section. And tell me what you wonder about. My old friends can play too. I'll go first in the comments.

I have quite a few posts in process but not much time to write. I'm remodeling my kids' bathroom, and we have quite a bit of company dropping in over the next couple of weeks.

In the hopper:
Deconstruction
Winners and Losers
Why I'm Not Joining The Emerging Church

Oh my!.....stay tuned.

Rules of Self-Effort

2007-08-03T07:48:00.000-06:00

Rule 1: Don’t have anything wrong with you.

Rule 2: If you do, get over it quickly.

Rule 3: If you can’t get over it quickly, then fake it.

Rule 4: If you can’t get over it quickly or fake it, then stay way from me. I don’t want anyone to think I have it too.

I had this saved on file and can't remember where I first read it. It speaks of how uncomfortable Christians sometimes are about accepting the messiness of real transformation. I think that often in our churches we opt for the quick work of behavior modification rather than real inner transformation brought about by the work of the Holy Spirit in a person's life.

Naked Pastor recently had a post about taking the time to allow for transformation that occurs through a deepening grasp of the depths of God's love for us.

"The kind of change that the whole human enterprise seems to admire and encourage is the candy-coated kind. Way more dazzle and impressiveness and instantaneous results."

Today Brother Maynard has a great post about authenticity, transparency, and the importance of supporting one another in the midst of the struggle.

"The “during” is the part where there’s trouble. It’s the part that we don’t want to hear about, and the part where we leave people alone. It’s the part where those who struggle most need help and support and the part where they’re least likely to get it."

It's all about grace - the messy, wonderful, transforming grace of God's love.

A More Generous View

2007-07-27T06:39:00.000-06:00

Update:
Yes, feel free to use the posters. I appreciate everyone who has linked to them already.

Also, I must HT to:
Br.Maynard for the phrase "Live your faith. Share your life."
StockXchng for use of the images.
Despair, Inc. for the DIY poster generator.
Many emerging/missional blogs for the commonly accepted usage and meaning of these terms.

--------------------

I didn't recognize my views in the posters that were made (elsewhere) concerning emerging church terms. So I decided to make my own posters that represent my simple understanding of emerging/missional terminology.

I hope these are encouraging to you:

Non-Answers About Church and Community

2007-07-22T20:32:00.002-06:00

Who are my church and community? My answer no longer fits in a tidy box.

Losing 20-year friendships left me wondering about the facade of community we experienced in church. I lost my sense of purpose in being joined with other believers. Every seemingly important thing that we had spent our lives on was a pile of rubbish.

When we first started going to the new church, I tried connecting with the people there. They were friendly. However, it felt like attending someone else's family reunion or like dating someone you knew you weren't going to marry.

I don't blame them. I am the one who isn't willing to commit. I just can't muster up the desire to serve in church programs. Deeper commitment = Deeper relationships. To be honest, I am unwilling to spend my time playing that game now.

Is this my church? Are they my community?

Then our former church family showed up at the new church. Suddenly, after 2 years of silent loneliness, we were reconciled with our friends as they left the CLB. It is wonderful to be surrounded by family once again.

Now we are like an entire family attending someone else's family reunion. We have made ourselves at home in the new church. There is no denying the strong underlying connection among those who are former members of the CLB.

Is this my church? Are they my community? Are they only my church if we join the new club?

The following quote by Dietrich Bonhoeffer has been posted on quite a few blogs this week. This is something that we experienced first hand.

The man who fashions a visionary ideal of community demands that it be realized by God, by others, and by himself. He enters the community of Christians with his demands, sets up his own law, and judges the brethren and God Himself accordingly. He stands adamant, a living reproach to all others in the circle of brethren. He acts as if he is the creator of the Christian community, as if his dream binds men together.

When things do not go his way, he calls the effort a failure. When his ideal picture is destroyed, he sees the community going to smash. So he becomes, first the accuser of his brethren, then an accuser of God, and finally the despairing accuser of himself.

Our former church was a non-denominational church. It was a church family. Like most families, it wasn't perfect, but there was a depth of commitment and shared history.

When the church joined with the apostle, he came in with his visionary ideal of community. Much of the language sounded great - authentic community, shared life, one-anothering, etc. Here is a quote from his teaching.

"We are intentionally moving past Sunday morning religion or church toward building a community that flourishes through growing relationships with God and each other. The world will know that we are Christians by how we love one another. Community is the result of a commitment of the heart that we intentionally make to God and each other."

Sounds great, right?

It soon became obvious that his heavy-handed approach for creating ideal community was destroying the real community that already existed. He has driven away the majority of the families, accusing them of individualism and of being unwilling to commit to community. The following paragraph may give you a glimpse into why this approach to creating community is failing.

"The culture of our community is being built intentionally and can suffer harm by the intentional exertion of our selfish man. That old man within us must be brought into check continually by trusting the grace of God to empower us to change and by submitting to the body and the leaders that Christ has put into our lives. We must all willingly make ourselves accountable to kingdom rank and authority. Behavior contrary to the Kingdom of God cannot be overlooked at any level because it threatens the very life and security of the community we are building."

It is not exaggerating to say that this method has been disastrous and has created a culture of controlled conformity that is being held up as a model of true kingdom community.

What actually creates community among people? I don't believe attendance at a Sunday service automatically creates community.

An interesting thing among the former church members is that relationships of convenience are no longer taken for granted. People are intentionally pursuing fellowship with potlucks, dinners, and coffees. They have purposed to maintain their relationships outside of the club. Another interesting thing is that it seems that the relationships have become better in some ways. Former social divisions no longer seem to matter.

These are my people. It is so comfortable. Maybe it isn't supposed to be comfortable. Maybe I was supposed to find new people. Maybe I'm not supposed to have people. I don't know.

I do know that I don't trust Sunday morning church to provide community, and I don't trust people with plans for creating and organizing community.

Just don't ask me who my church or community is, because I don't know.

Another Road Trip

2007-07-20T08:07:00.000-06:00

This is sick.*

*(crazy, cool, insane)

It doesn't look like Shaun is the prop-your-bare-feet-on-the-dashboard kind of passenger.

8 Brilliant Women Writers

2007-07-18T12:17:00.000-06:00

I was recently tagged by Jared for an 8 things about me meme. Sorry I didn't get it done sooner Jared. When I was tagged for the 7 things about me meme, I dodged the bullet with the 7 books meme. Since I am plum out of fascinating tidbits about myself, this time I will introduce you to the writing of 8 brilliant women.

A Former Leader posted an awesome piece today comparing Midwives and Shepherds.

Shepherd: Understands that each person in their walk with God will have to find their own rhythm. Does not think that everyone will look the same – especially in the hardest moments. Does not have a cookie cutter plan for discipleship.
Traditional Pastor: Does not understand this at all. Has a dictated plan for everyone that usually looks like the plan that he has found to work for himself.

Mary wrote a passionate piece about the Idolatry of Excellence.

"...how did this idolatry of excellence make it into a community of believers when we read that Paul (who had more to boast about than many people do) chose to boast in his weaknesses, that the first is last and the last is first, that those with stained reputations and skeletons in their closets became great heroes in the Bible..."

Erin did a great job of discussing Bob Hyatt's recent article about Church. This nugget is from her reply to me in the comment section.

"...when I was involved in church my time slowly seeped away until I no longer had time to be with my friends, family, or community who are outside of my church. These days I am loving investing myself in relationships which I previously did not have time for because of church commitments."

Sonja in a post titled Missional vs. Consumerism touched on courtesy and respect as a very basic and fundamental part of having a missional attitude.

"So, I’m coming to learn that having a missional outlook embodies an entirely different attitude about being out in the world. It means being involved with the people I come into contact with, even if only superficially."

Pam has found herself in a place of incredible pain having recently lost both her father and a close friend. Her gift of expressing herself is especially honest and soul-touching as she shares her grief in her post Living Moment by Moment.

I was hesitant to share Pam's post on this list because it isn't just a piece of writing. It is a piece of her heart. Pam is always a brilliant writer, but in the midst of real pain, sometimes writing becomes something sacred. If you read about her private pain, please say a prayer for her also.

"Moment by moment, this is how I am living. Grief is no longer an unwelcome stranger, but has become a companion, a steady presence that grips my arm and leads me along the path. I will walk this course. I do not walk alone."

Cindy is busy painting (brilliantly, I'm sure!) I don't know if there is anyone more consistently insightful, not only in her own writing, but also in her comments around the blogosphere.

Makeesha passes along lots of interesting tidbits, but she is at her best when she is sharing from her heart, which is exactly what she did in her Bathtub Musings.

"They begin talking about non christians as if they were aliens from another planet sent here to taint their puerile existence."

And if any of you have been missing Molly, she is Writing For Her Kids and she recently wrote about the Night Terrors that mothers experience when our imaginations run wild with worry in the middle of the night.

"Without God, I’m not sure I could escape this circle of thoughts."

So, there you go! All of these women are oozing with talent and creativity, and I am sure that you will find them fascinating.

Modus Operandi

2007-07-16T07:51:00.000-06:00

I have been reading and thinking about church this week...

David Fitch brought up the messy aspect of dealing with differences in community.

"...it was the preserving of difference that made way for such a missional order of community where a.) people can learn to love the other and b.) become places of hospitality, ministry and service for Christ's mission."

Brother Maynard swiped at the pastoral model of church.

"We’ve got to be willing to take a good hard look at the way we lead, follow, and build… and I know where we got those shepherds… we created them, just like the nation of Israel demanded a king."

Bob stirred things up this week with his article Why I'm Not Done With Church.

Bob says:

This is church:
"If someone wants to be a house church of 5 or 10 people, then okay. That's *great* in fact. Baptize people, take communion, serve the poor together, read and discuss Scripture and pray with and for each other. Regularly worship God together and when necessary, correct one another."

This is not:
"But the option I don't believe is on the table for people following Jesus is to disconnect from the larger Body of Christ, circle up with a couple of buddies, and assume that having some spiritual conversations now and again (mostly focused on what sucks about church) is sufficient."

And people reacted.

The miscommunication reminded me of the posts and comments that I've read on "the dark side." When you start off with a premise about a group of people - for example that all emerging people are unsaved heretics - it is not likely your writing will connect with them based on a premise they do not identify with.

The typical responses always follow,
"Not all emergents are like that."
"Then why are you so defensive?"
"You just don't understand us."
"...strawman..."
"...nailing jello to a wall..."
"something about Nazis and Hitler..."
and it is down hill from there.

Bob has said if you don't identify, then the article isn't about you. So great. No harm, no foul.

For those who truly fit his description of being completely disconnected, please hear Bob's encouragement "....to pursue healing and pursue *church* no matter what it looks like."

As we consider the operating system of church...

Who decides what is a valid and legitimate expression of local gathering?

Can we have "free agents" in the church? Or do we have to pick a team?

Some "out of church" christians DO consider themselves connected to the body of believers and they DO intentionally pursue community. However, their definition of community differs in that it is not limited to a designated meeting or organization.

(While I am using the term "out of church" christians, many of these people do not consider themselves "out of church." However, this term is typically used to describe those who do not identify with structured models of church.)

Our imagination of church tends to be stuck on static models. We think in terms of a specific group of people, meeting at specific times, often in a specific location.

Much of the focus is on the development and growth that we experience as part of a community. The intent of gathering, in whatever form, centers around the quality and depth of community that we will experience.

Lacking a missional purpose, community becomes self-serving. This is why we have the pastoral-care model of church. It is all about us, our needs, and our growth.

With the focus on community and our relationships with one another, we become distanced from relationships that we had before we became involved in our church community. Because we define church according to our particular group, we often neglect connecting relationally with others in the body of Christ.

It was Michael Frost who said that when we focus on building community, we destroy it. His idea of communitas is community that develops in the process of pursuing mission.

I have posted about this before. Even when our ideals are missional, I think that churches are rarely created with mission as the primary purpose.

"Missional community emerges from missional purpose first. We gather with those who share our heart and passion for this cause. We function together in the service of this cause. Our service together is what produces liminality which then creates the communitas we share as a group."

What if the point is not about forming or maintaining a community? What if instead of creating a gathering, we pursued a missional purpose and allowed community to develop in that process? What if we trusted that real community would develop in the process of mission, that we would find comrades amidst our journey?

This is where our opinion of "out of church" christians matters. Perhaps some of them are not sitting around wounded waiting for the church to figure out a way to develop an outreach ministry for the unchurched.

Maybe they really are faithful disciples who believe that the Holy Spirit will form community in their lives. Could we give them the benefit of the doubt? Could we imagine that the Holy Spirit can create community outside of our need to organize and formulate relationships?

I believe that within the group of "out of church" christians is the potential for church to be done in ways that we have never imagined. No, they aren't conforming to our ideas of community. They test our sense of how things ought to be. They express a view and expectation of church that does not fit established models.

It is possible they are following God, and within them is the imagination to be the church in a way we have not yet dreamed.

Refellowshipping

2007-07-14T10:35:00.001-06:00

Many people have recently left our CLB.

It is too bad, but it is what it is.

Most of the people who left wish they could go back to the way things used to be. Many have come to accept that, stay or leave, things will never be the way they used to be.

Like us, the majority of the people who left attend a local community church. It is nice, and you get to see the people you know. After the service you will find most of the ex-church members visiting together.

Once people left, we were free to re-establish relationship with them. After the shunning and isolation, the fellowship has been wonderful.

While there is a strong bond and desire to connect, there seems to be a restraint from attempting to recreate a gathering specifically for this group. It seems that perhaps we are supposed to be experiencing the discomfort and unease of this transition.

I wonder why God would take a tight-knit group of mature believers and scatter them.

Perhaps we have to detach from our former idea of church in order to embrace new understanding of being the church.

Maybe this explains it...

Manure in a pile is called “manure” but manure that’s been spread out is called something else: “fertilizer”.

(HT to Shaun)

Disfellowshipped?

2007-07-10T19:40:00.000-06:00

Were we disfellowshipped? My husband and I had this discussion the other day.

No, we were not excommunicated as a result of disciplinary proceedings for unrepentant sin in our lives.

We left when it became obvious that the intent of the leadership was not honest and mutual reconciliation.

We were told that we could not leave. Apparently our leaders didn't get the memo that the relationship was voluntary.

Technically, it is not being disfellowshipped if you leave voluntarily, but the end result is the same - severing of relationships.

Because of the leaders fear of what we might reveal, there was social pressure for the congregation to not associate with us.

So yes, our fellowship with our church family was broken. In that sense, we were disfellowshipped.

Recently, I ran across this quote by Alan Roxburgh:

"I spent almost twenty-seven years in a denomination. I thought I ‘belonged’ to the tribe over that time. In recent years I was in situations where I realized that if you didn’t fit the narrative a process of exclusion ensued. None of it was out loud or direct but, nevertheless, it happened. The details don’t matter as much as the kind of questions that began to form for me. I wondered what kind of tribe had I belonged too for so many years that could so easily exclude? What are the actual, operative theologies at work among such a group (theologies that I had shared in one form or another)? But much more critically, what is the understanding of God and the other that permeates a Christian narrative that can easily put the other outside?"

Is exclusion ever valid or necessary?

Ron Shaw at A Hopeful Heretic has blogged about the disciplinary aspect of excommunication or disfellowshipping. He refers to it as The Nuclear Option for Spiritual Formation.

In an extremely thoughtful post, based on I Cor. 5, discussing the biblical validity of this practice and the resulting fallout on the community and relationships, Ron says this:

"Make no mistake about it, this practice is to spiritual formation what nuclear bombs are to diplomacy. Everybody loses when a church gets to this point with a member of their fellowship."

I have witnessed this practice at least four times at my CCLB - CRAZY Church Left Behind. These real-life scenarios definitely contribute to my feelings about this topic.

I have given my initial response in the comment section, which is followed by further insightful comments from Ron. I would be very interested in reading about your experience, your understanding of this passage, and your views about the practice of excommunication. Please join the conversation at Ron's blog.

07.07.07 - Road Trip

2007-07-09T07:58:00.001-06:00

Like many other people, we attended a wedding on Saturday. Although we don't know the bride or groom very well, we felt somewhat obligated to attend the wedding. The groom's mother has worked for us for 17 years.

The wedding was held in a small town 3 and 1/2 hours east of where we live. The wedding was at 4:00, reception at 6:00. We decided to attend the ceremony and leave before the reception in order to be home at a decent time. Not wanting to travel that far and arrive late, we left home 4 and 1/2 hours before the ceremony.

Where we live are really beautiful. However, less than an hour east of here, the scenery changes into endless miles of desolate prairie as far as the eye can see. It is really hard for people who live in more populated areas to imagine the vast emptiness. In fact, when people experience it for the first time, they find it quite eerie.

At about the half-way point, we stopped at a little town that has 2 gas stations and is the only real town on that 3 hour stretch of highway. It was 108 degrees there Saturday afternoon. We planned to stop for 5 minutes to stretch our legs, use the bathroom, and grab a coke.

The gas station we chose only had one bathroom which had been hijacked by a 7-year-old girl. A line had formed and unfortunately, I was fourth in line. I don't even want to know what she was doing in there for over 10 minutes.

While waiting in line, I weighed my options. Since I already drank a large bottle of water and since I was planning on drinking a 20 oz. diet coke, a bathroom break seemed inevitable. Except for squatting along the road, this was my only option. So, I waited, and waited, and waited, and our 5 minute stop turned into a 20 minute stop.

Finally, we were back on the road, empty bladders, cold drinks, air-conditioning, and nothing but miles of grass.

That is when it dawned on us that the town where the wedding was being held might be in a different time zone. We weren't sure since the town is near where the time changes. We tried calling my dad, who is a wealth of trivial information and might know this little fact, but we couldn't get a cell signal.

We suddenly went from potentially being an hour early to possibly being 15 minutes late. I increased my speed to 80 mph, even though that wouldn't be enough. 100 mph might have done it.

After having driven over 2 hours, my husband now suggested we turn around and go home. There was still a possibility that we weren't late, and if we were late, it was only going to be about 15 minutes (the amount of time I spent waiting for the little girl in the bathroom!). Maybe the wedding would start a little late, so we wouldn't miss much. However, sometimes weddings are so short that if it started on time, we might miss the whole thing.

We just kept driving. We were within 15 minutes of the little town when we faced reality and saw the sign announcing a different time zone. Our clock said 3:00 which meant the wedding was starting. We decided to go anyway and just slip in the back. It was mid-sermon, and we did witness the vows.

We had not planned on staying for the reception, but it was one of few options for dinner. There were no fast food places, so it was either the grocery store or the reception if we were going to eat. We went to the reception only long enough to eat and were back on the road again.

I brought some Graham Cooke CD's along to listen to, but we were enjoying the chance to talk for a few hours. Road trips are good for that. We stopped at the other gas station this time, and we were in and out in under 5 minutes.

On the last leg of our trip, with a couple hours yet to drive, we popped in a CD and listened to Graham explain God's process in our lives as we rode off into the sunset - obligation fulfilled, hubby spitting sunflower seeds while he drove, and me with my bare feet propped on the dashboard sipping the last of one too many cokes for the day.

Friday Quote

2007-07-06T08:37:00.000-06:00

"...it seems that God doesn't care about our short lists. He consistently taps the rejects. It's as if he were the captain of a pick-up basketball team, and he picks all the short heavy kids, just to prove that he can beat the other team all by himself. But then he manages to win the game as a team, just to prove he's not a ball-hog."

Ryan Wiksell - The Core Blog

I love the imagery of God who chooses the misfits and losers.

(Not that any of us are misfits and losers! But just in case we were, God would still want us on his team.)

The Speck in Your Brother's iPhone

2007-07-02T14:47:00.001-06:00

The buzz in my little corner of the blogosphere about the iphone has been interesting. Here are several of the most recent posts from my blogroll, both pro and con, about purchasing an iphone:

Bill Kinnon says, "What future moth-eaten and rust-potentialed things do I cling to? God help me!"

Bob Hyatt got one. He says, "I'm a weak, weak man and Steve Jobs totally owns me."

Helen did too. She says, "It’s interesting what people will pay for..."

Brant Hansen puts it on his list of Totally Awesome Things I'm Not Going to Buy!

Sean Palmer confesses, "all of my sermons and talk about consumerism and the American culture of lust and excess have blown up in my face."

According to "overly critical idealistic uncool hippie blogger" Shaun Groves, "The iPhone does what our current pieces of plastic and circuitry do, only it’s newer and different...and cool."

New technology isn't something I lust after. In fact, I only got my first cell phone around Christmas. I think it's a Razr. My kids say it has a camera and a voicemail thing, but I don't know how to use them yet. Obviously, I have no need for more technology since I am not using the technology I already have.

I think if we are honest, we each have at least one area of indulgence that would be tough to defend in the face of world poverty. When it comes to consumerism and where we draw the line on purchases, I don't think we can draw that line for someone else.

Personally, I have plenty of my own logs to deal with. In fact, I can't even see your speck.

7 Books I'm Reading

2007-06-27T08:54:00.000-06:00

In response to being tagged by Joy for a meme of 7 things about me, I decided to go with 7 of the books I'm reading now because you can tell about someone by the books they're reading, right?

7 Books I'm Reading

1. At the gym - Traveling Mercies by Anne Lamott

Interesting. I've not read anything by her before. I like her way of describing situations and feelings. The uniqueness of writers' voices interests me. We can grow in writing skills, but I'm not sure if we can really change the tenor of the voice that others hear when they read our words. I sometimes wish my voice were edgy, creative, and random. I could change the name of my blog to Edgy Grace.

2. In my van - Approaching the Heart of Prophecy by Graham Cooke

My first step back into the prophetic realm. While my heart never really left, I needed to detox from the things I formerly knew about prophecy. I am ready to take a new look at the role of prophecy in our lives, and I trust Graham and his understanding of God and prophecy.

3. In my purse - Towards a Powerful Inner Life by Graham Cooke

A great little book about living from our spirit rather than our soul. A little gem..."When God breaks us, He breaks us wide open. In that shattered mirror, we see who we are supposed to be."

4. In the living room - Callanetics for Your Back and Yoga for Back Care

If my body had an expiration date on it, I'm afraid it would say Best Used by 2006. I'm hopeful that specific stretching and strengthening exercises will help to alleviate some of the problems I've been having. I have also limited sitting at the computer (which makes it harder to keep up with blogging).

5. On my desk - The Forgotten Ways by Alan Hirsch

I stalled out on this one. I had to step back and take a bit of a break from overthinking church stuff. I need to process and let my heart catch up with the many things I have read lately. Also, it feels like a transitional time of sorting it all out in the context of our current situation of church and relationships.

6. On my nightstand - The Message

I have not read all of The Message, but lately I've been hanging around in Luke 10-15, John 15 (love this chapter), skimming through Acts, taking a closer look at I Corinthians 12-14, and pondering the first few chapters of Revelation.

7. On the couch where I fell asleep last night - Waiting for Morning by Karen Kingsbury

I usually have a novel going and Karen's are always good.

What's next...

Just picked up for 25 cents at a garage sale - The Father Heart of God by Floyd McClung - because God loves me and He knows I would like this book!

Oops! I forgot the tag thing. I would love to read some other 7 Books lists from my friends, so consider yourself tagged and leave a link to your blog in the comments.

God's Will & Your Calling

2007-06-20T06:13:00.001-06:00

More excellent writing that I've come across...

Shaun Groves in his post, Bonus Room Do Over, gives this helpful advice on finding God's will for your life. The entire post is definitely worth a read.

"Whatever you decide to do for a living, decide to love God more than yourself, love the poor and the sick and the hopeless more than your own happiness, love the intern as much as the boss, love your kids more than a promotion, love your wife more than your laptop. This is God’s will for your entire life. To pull this off you’ll need to buy as little as you can. The more stuff you own the more you’ll feel you have to work, the more depressed you’ll be when work isn’t fun, and the more you’ll equate God’s will with what you do for work, and the less time you’ll have to discover all the other things life is supposed to be about."

Robbymac continues with some excellent points about how we view our "calling" in relation to our vocation or occupation in his post, Calling & Identity.

"Part of the problem, I think, is that too many people – myself included – confuse a sense of “calling” with “that from which I receive a paycheque”. For example, if you view your “calling” as being a full-time, financially-compensated clergy-unit, and then the church down-sizes you, suddenly an identity crisis of biblical proportions hits you like a proverbial camel train.

If I make “being a paid pastor” my “calling”, then I could lose my sense of calling and identity depending on whether or not I had a vocational financially-compensated placement in a pastoral role. And my calling and identity would be in the hands of whatever people held the power of hiring and firing.

However, if my calling and identity is that of an encourager, I can do that with or without a position, title, recognition, notoriety, or paycheque. And my calling and identity would be in the hands of Someone far greater."

Good stuff Robby and Shaun!

An early post of mine, Be What You Are, contained some thoughts along this theme.

"Go ahead and be what you are. Let the life of Christ be expressed through you in the ways that are in your heart, not worrying about whether your giftings carry a title. If it is in your heart to mentor and shepherd, don't wait for someone to call you an elder or pastor. Go ahead and serve with the giftings that are in you."

'Be what you are' is a phrase I continue to use to remind myself and others to live out what is in our heart in spite of obstacles or doubts. When we find that place of God-given identity within, we can live into that with confidence, regardless of whether we receive recognition. There is no one or nothing that can ultimately prevent you from living out what you truly are.

Out of Control

2007-06-18T14:24:00.000-06:00

...and loving it!

I want to point you to excerpts from a couple of excellent posts that I read today. In my mind, these ideas seemed to flow together.

In his post, The God of Chaotic Expression, Brother Maynard says:

"If God is willing to take huge risks with creation and with whom he leaves the keys to the kingdom — or the butcher shop, why aren’t we? It seems to me that we’ve built hierarchical structures around ensuring that the wrong people don’t get allowed to do too much, that the heavy lifting is left up to the professionals, and that somebody in charge keeps tabs on everything, rendering permission and the loan of keys on an as-needed basis to make sure nothing gets too far out of line, and to snap it back if it does. Somebody like a bank president with a big gold watch. God seems to be far more content with chaotic expressions than we are. He empowers all of us far more than we seem willing to have each other empowered."

On a related note, from his post on Home Church, Brant says:

"C'mon. Get serious. That'd be messy. You need visionaries, leaders who take charge and keep tabs and control stuff. You'll need structures in place for control.

Like the ones Jesus gave the disciples: "Above all, don't let this thing spread too fast. I hope you paid attention to all my hierarchical instructions. Don't fear, because while I'm leaving, I'll leave with you a plan for structure that will guide you, and comfort you, and..."

Great writing Brother Maynard and Brant!

5 Things I Dig About Jesus

2007-06-17T11:57:00.000-06:00

In response to the meme started by John Smulo. What an awesome topic!

I have a feeling that many of our answers will be similar, so I have avoided reading other responses to this meme yet.

5 of my favorite things about Jesus:

1. I love that He sees the invisible people and those who are like lepers.
2. I love that I cannot earn His love and acceptance.
3. I love that He has enough love to heal every broken thing within me.
4. I love the promise and beauty that He sees in each person.
5. I love that He turned the tables on worldly and religious systems of power.

John's rules:
1. Those tagged will share 5 Things They Dig About Jesus.
2. Those tagged will tag 5 people.
3. Those tagged will leave a link to their meme in the comments section of this post so everyone can keep track of what's being posted.

The 5 people I will tag:
1. Cindy
2. Mary
3. Former Leader
4. Sonja
5. Pam

Miscellany

2007-06-15T06:49:00.001-06:00

We attended church last Sunday. It was a good Sunday because they did baptisms. I really appreciated hearing the testimonies and witnessing the involvement this church had in the peoples' salvation and discipleship.

We also attended house church that day. We have continued to stay in touch with those who are doing house church here because it reflects our values and beliefs concerning church. However, my husband and I both sense pretty clearly that this is not the direction for us to pursue at this time.

It has been a week of great conversations with many friends. I have had quite a few conversations about whether charismatics can/should settle in at a noncharismatic church. These have been interesting discussions involving the ideas of style and preference versus what aspects of charismatic belief are necessary as a part of public worship and church.

Directionally, things are still as clear as mud. In the midst of that, we will just open our home and our table and enjoy life. We had a potluck a couple of weeks ago and were encouraged recently by a person who said it was the most "life" they had experienced in months. And we didn't even have a meeting! :)

Anyway, it is all a bit odd, and we will attempt to hold things loosely so that we can hopefully follow wherever the Lord leads.

Two Weddings and A Funeral

2007-06-14T07:48:00.001-06:00

A year after we left our church, I attended the wedding of the child of one of my few remaining friends from the CLB.

By this time the subtle and not-so-subtle nuances of shunning were familiar to me - the silence of my phone; the showers, weddings, birthdays, and graduations I wasn't invited to; the friends who were suddenly too busy for our regular shopping and coffee dates; the quick glances to the side when people pretended not to see me.

This friend was willing to still include me even though it was unpopular to be seen with me. She didn't understand what was going on with us, and we didn't talk about it.

Attending that wedding was extremely difficult. To stay isolated would have been much easier than enduring the pitying looks. We were the only people out of the CLB at the time, the only supposedly backslidden outcasts.

The pastor of our CLB performed the ceremony. It was the only time I had seen him since we left. I spent most of the evening making sure that I wasn't wherever he was.

I wanted to be more mature than that, but it was all I could muster just to be there. Every moment of the entire evening was like a knife twisting in my heart.

I had recently started blogging. Not surprising, my post the next day was titled Oceans of Emptiness.

..............

Last weekend, I attended another wedding. My friends no longer attend the CLB. In fact, most of my friends and acquaintances are out now. There are now more former members than there are remaining members.

As people leave, our relationships are being restored. People see, they understand, and some apologize.

At the last wedding, I was like a shadow person; at this wedding, I enjoyed open friendship and fellowship, no longer cloaked in humiliation. Many times during the weekend I looked around truly in awe at the miracle of reconciliation that I have experienced. It is more than I ever expected.

As much as I have shared with you about the abuse and the pain, I wanted to share with you the blessing of experiencing this restoration of relationships.

..............

Sadly, the CLB is in a downward spiral with dark and twisty things continuing to unfold behind the scenes. Although it still functions, the vision it formerly represented is dead. The life of the community continues outside of the organization, freed from the control of those who attempted to confine and define community according to their rules.

Some who have recently left are still focused on the death of what was. Out of this death however, there will be a resurrection. In time, we will discover what God has for us on the other side of this experience.

Church Politics

2007-06-12T11:17:00.000-06:00

Politics - social relations involving intrigue to gain authority or power

God never intended for political power to be used in the church.

"You know how the kings of the nations show their power to the people. Important leaders use their power over the people. It must not be that way with you." Matthew 20:25-26 (NLV)

The old saying that "power corrupts and absolute power corrupts absolutely" may be true. From my experience, power tends to reveal corruption.

My intent with this post and my previous post is not to go down the path of leader bashing. That is not fruitful for any of us.

Every experience of spiritual abuse is not the result of an abusive pastor. However most can be traced to the abuse of power within a church political system resulting in someone being abused. Depending on where the power lies, at times the person being abused is the pastor.

One of the most freeing things I came across early on in my recovery from SA was a site about workplace bullying. For the first time, someone was describing the nature of the tactics and manipulations we had experienced. There was nothing in my life that had prepared me for the underhanded things we confronted, and I had trouble dealing with my disbelief that such things could happen in church.

If you are currently in relationship with a bully, your best approach is flattery, emotional distance, and avoidance of conflict. No matter how hard you attempt to befriend them in a healthy peer relationship, it cannot work. To them, everyone is perceived as either an asset or a liablity. If you are an asset, you will be manipulated for their purposes, and if you are a liability, you will be targeted with abuse.

Why talk about this? Because if you experienced a failed relationship with a bully, it is likely you were left with the frustration and doubt of wondering what you could have done differently. The fact is, there is rarely a workable solution to conflict with a person like this.

The good news is, you have options.
You get to forgive.
You get to release them to God's judgment.
You get to heal.
And you get to move on.

When you truly understand the nature of this type of personality disorder, you will realize the pathetic emptiness in that person's ability to sustain healthy relationships. You may even find it in your heart to pray for the healing of their emotions. Due to their deep-seated fear of being exposed, this would truly require a miracle.

In the end, it is all incredibly sad. Relationships and sometimes churches are destroyed. Maybe God knew why political power structures wouldn't work within the church.

Always Be Nice

2007-06-05T08:13:00.002-06:00

That's the christian motto, right? Or is it the Boy Scout motto? I forget.

Christians should always be nice. We should use nice language, smile a lot, be happy, turn the other cheek, did I say smile a lot? Happy, happy, happy.

I am not suggesting we be nasty, but I have noticed that sometimes christians squirm at the least bit of conflict or difficulty. The reality is that life outside the christian bubble is not always syrupy sweet, and sometimes life within the christian bubble is not all that sweet either.

You know why spiritual abuse is so dang unworkable? Because you were dealing with someone who was not playing fair, while the entire time you were trying to play by christian rules.

Some of the most inspirational reading I have done over the last few days has been about a couple of books from the business world - The No Asshole Rule, by Bob Sutton (ht Bill Kinnon) and Snakes in Suits, by Paul Babiak (ht to Robbymac).

The No Asshole Rule talks about interacting with people who leave you feeling demeaned, belittled, and de-energized. The author has taken a lot of flack over the title of the book, but I agree with his defense regarding the word choice. Rather than simply an attempt at vulgarity, "no other word quite captures the essence of this type of person."

The other book, Snakes in Suits, further discusses the bullying personality type that operates in this way and explains some of their methodology. In describing abusive pastors, people often describe a person operating in a degree of personality disorder, sometimes using the word sociopath or narcissist.

Obviously it wouldn't be fair to describe everyone you dislike as a psychopath. However, the awareness that sometimes you are dealing with a person whose behavior and methodology are outside the norm can be extremely helpful.

There are aspects of this pattern and the systemic issues in church in particular that facilitate and encourage these personalities that intrigue me, but I am hesitant to write further about it because, let's face it, it is not a very nice topic.

The People Formerly Known as Leaders

2007-06-01T06:00:00.001-06:00

Today, I have the privelege of pointing you to the blogs of two awesome women. They were both involved in leadership in their churches and have now joined the ranks of church leavers.

I remember reading at one time that the majority of church leavers were former leaders. Very few have left their relationship with the Lord, but many have walked away from the church system of which they were an integral part.

Both Former Leader and Mary are blogging anonymously at this time. You have to wonder what kind of church experience leaves people feeling like they belong in the witness protection program. However, I do understand the need for sensitivity to the churches and people we have known. It is difficult to blog openly about this without hurting others who were involved.

Former Leader has written a confessional piece along the lines of the PFKATC meme entitled The Person Formerly Known As Your Leader. I believe it is a very fitting piece to be included in this series. I would also encourage you to add her blog to your reader. In many ways, I feel like she has picked up the story of detox where my journey of detox has ended. Many who find themselves in the beginning stages of detox will find encouragement and comfort in her words as she posts about her journey.

Mary takes an honest look at some of the inherited attitudes that she and her husband carried into planting a church in her post Going The Wrong Way. Mary has a story that needs to be heard, and I am looking forward to reading as she continues sharing about her journey away from church leadership.

Too Much Grace?

2007-05-31T13:52:00.000-06:00

One of Graham's favorite sayings is, "God isn't an evangelical."

His point is that God isn't worried about our sin because He has already dealt with it. He isn't angry or disillusioned with us ("because He never had any illusions about you to start with.")

Sin is the result of broken identity.

The conviction from the Holy Spirit is not about sin, it is always about restoring identity.

Our growth is connected to our understanding of God, and our responsibility is to deliberately cooperate with His Spirit in His work of restoration in our lives.

The evangelical perspective is on a judgmental God. The message of the gospel is first and foremost a message of repentance, that sinners face an angry God. Even if the focus is on the love of God, there is still an emphasis on getting right with God, and once saved, a focus on getting all of the details of your doctrine correct.

The missional perspective seems to be that God loves us while we are yet sinners and that our sins are already forgiven before we even repent of them.

I think one of the biggest offenses of the evangelical gospel has been confronting people on the basis of their sin rather than introducing them to the love, grace, and mercy of God.

Do we dare run around in the ridiculous lavishness of His grace and trust others with that abundance of grace? What could happen if we let people be free of judgment, willy-nilly, without the restraint of guilt? Could their mistakes be any worse than the mistakes of legalism?

Monday Morning Thoughts

2007-05-28T08:14:00.000-06:00

One of the things that I like about Graham is that his message is always so simple - basic, down-to-earth, no hype or pretense. Yet, when you hear him, you realize that if you were to truly get it, this is all you really need to know.

As usual, interwoven throughout his teaching was his revelation of the goodness and kindness of God. At times, I wanted to smack my forehead wondering, "why do I forget?" I know these things. At what point do my thoughts get twisted around and mired in things that don't really matter?

That is what the body is for though, isn't it, to remind one another of who we are and who God is to us.

He spoke quite a bit about the present/future aspect of our lives, that while we have a present reality, our future is already a present reality to God. I appreciated how this gives a more organic understanding of the nature of prophecy than the gifts-focused emphasis that prophecy has had in the church.

With a present/future understanding we can co-labor with one another and with God, moving towards His vision for our future, both corporately and individually.

One area of this that Graham highlighted was accountability. He said - What if accountability wasn't about judgment and correction? What if it was about having friends who know and understand the dreams that God has for you? And what if they care about you enough to remind you of those dreams and promises when you need to be encouraged? Therefore rather than looking for areas of failure in your life, they are instead looking for opportunities to hold you up and support you.

For me personally, I didn't take away anything specifically earth-shaking. I was encouraged, especially to trust in regard to our future, that God can bring about the things that He wants to accomplish in us. I was also encouraged that an understanding of the goodness of God can minister reconciliation and redemption in very ordinary circumstances. I was reminded of what an incredible love we ambassador to those around us.

As Graham would say, "That is flippin' good news!"

Guess What?

2007-05-25T07:26:00.000-06:00

I get to see Graham Cooke this weekend!

This time, my husband gets to go with me. He just finished reading Permission Granted, and he is looking forward to hearing Graham in person.

I am anxious to hear what God has to say to me through Graham this weekend. I will be sure to share with you next week.

Truth with a Twist

2007-05-16T05:33:00.001-06:00

Earlier this week I came across our CLB's website and listened to portions of a message given by the apostle. If you were to visit the website, most of you would think it looks great, and it is likely that you would also enjoy the teaching of the apostle.

Much of what is being taught is really true and appealing. Many of these truths are important for the church today.

For example, there is a strong emphasis on the kingdom of God. As we personally submit to God's reign, the kingdom becomes manifest in our lives. The manifestation of the kingdom of God in our lives impacts the world around us.

There is an emphasis upon personal transformation. The teaching is that transformation begins in the heart with our revelation and understanding of God. As we allow God's grace to impact every area of our heart, we will experience growth and transformation. We submit ourselves to this process in order to develop integrity and truth in every aspect of our lives.

There is an understanding of church as more than just a weekly service. They reject the facade of traditional churchianity and promote a greater understanding of the people of God as a community.

There is a heavy emphasis on local community and the importance of our relationships with one another. It is in our relationships with each other, in our one-anothering, that the kingdom of God is demonstrated.

On a personal level, there is an emphasis on men doing business with integrity, wives loving their husbands, and living in honest accountable relationships with other believers.

This is why good, sincere people are still following this teaching. Anyone following the principles I've listed would grow in their Christian walk.

So what went wrong? The problem is that the teaching is truth with a twist.

It is confusing because while the words are all about love and unity, the methods and practices demand compliance and conformity.

The first twist is that the kingdom must be a demonstrated reality in our lives before we can affect the world around us. Therefore the focus is on the process of being perfected.

The effect of this is a completely inward focus. Rather than understanding that personal growth and transformation occur as we give our lives to love and serve the world around us, we become completely paralyzed and immersed in our own development.

The second major twist is that community is elevated above the individual. This sounds great as far as rejecting individualism and promoting unity, but it comes with a price when individuality is completely suppressed and rejected.

Heather at Free Heart Reflections posted this quote awhile back that caught my attention. This was in reference to what happened at Jonestown:

"In short, the ideology of Peoples Temple focused on commitment to the community, and to elevating the group above the individual."

This is where much of the damage has happened to this church. As the corporate ideal is elevated, people are called to die to their individual preferences. They are asked to commit to the community values and to protect and guard the unity of the group.

The problem with all of this is that it is transformation and unity as defined by the leadership. This has resulted in control in order to produce conformity. Information is controlled and differing perspectives are sacrificed for the sake of oneness.

The life of the Spirit has been squelched. There is no room for it in this controlled environment. People's gifts have been suppressed. Their discernment has been shut down with the threat that questioning is subversive and dangerous. In the effort to produce ideal community, a real thriving community has been destroyed.

There is a great deal of inspired truth and revelation in the teaching of this group. The appeal of truth is the hook. In this particular group, if you swallow the hook, you will find that you have bought into a toxic church environment.

It is the result of truth and revelation being interpreted through a grid of hierarchy and control. The real life that should be produced from the truth being taught is aborted at the hands of those who have put themselves in the position of controlling and defining the expression of life in this community.

In the end, many are left realizing that the reality wasn't what they hoped it would be. It fell far short of the ideal that was promised.

This may be very specific to my CLB, but perhaps there are things that others who are involved in toxic church systems can glean from this.

Churches, people, and teaching are never completely good or evil. In fact, there is usually much more truth than falseness. However a small degree of falseness can produce devastating results.

Remembering with Compassion and Empathy

2007-05-10T07:44:00.000-06:00

Sometimes I worry about the fact that I no longer feel the hurt from our encounter with spiritual abuse, that somehow it is my responsibility to continue to carry the pain.

I wrote the spiritual abuse articles from the midst of my grief. They came from a place that was real and feelings that were raw. I hope that the words from that time have the ability to connect with others who are now in the midst of their own raw and vulnerable situation.

I want those words to still connect because I no longer feel the same pain that I felt then. I remember feeling the pain, but it just doesn't hurt anymore. I suppose this is a good thing, a hopeful thing.

With just a little effort, I can remember the confusion of betrayal and of trust being broken. I can remember the rejection of friends no longer calling and acquaintances glancing away way when they saw me.

Now I watch with dispassionate regret as things continue to unravel at our CLB. As we encounter the latest refugees, I see the grief and loss that they are feeling, and I try to remember the degree of devastation we felt.

At the time I was crippled by the pain and overwhelmed with the loneliness. The anger and bitterness tormented me day and night as I tried to escape their dark reality. Sadness threatened to suck me into a never-ending darkness. I was afraid that there was no way out.

Maybe it is a good thing that as others go through this, I am not down in the pit with them. I know their pain, but now I stand as one removed from it, hopefully as proof that there is hope beyond where they are at this time.

What I have noticed of the refugees and exiles is that everyone's response is unique. Whether they struggle with the pain or whether they seem to breeze through it, one thing is true - the escape from control, as painful as it might be, is the first step toward a journey of freedom.

I believe that I will always have compassion for those who find themselves in this situation and a special understanding of what it is like. I also will always have an intolerance for the systems in churches that perpetuate this kind of injustice.

I want to share with you this prayer request from the comments of my previous post. Some of you have been in this person's shoes, and you also remember what it felt like. Please take a moment to pray for this person and their family. God knows who they are, and I know from experience that He cares deeply about their situation.

You and those who hang out here have greatly encouraged my journey. Could I ask you to pray for us here.

Tomorrow we meet with the "Apostle" and "Prophet" to have them ask us why we are leaving, give us the ramifications of our actions and tell us what "judgements and instructions" that will be proclaimed to a later meeting that night of the covenant members.

An email went out already today to all our friends. One of our guys called off work for tomorrow (we own our own business), and more hurt is on its way. Others are being told not to talk to us and so on.

You all have spoken of losing your friends in a day and now I am living it. Please pray grace for us to not retaliate but be kind and gracious.

I appreciate you and The Community.

A Former Leader

Sermons

2007-05-09T13:00:00.000-06:00

The sermon is to a church service as the entree is to a meal. It is the main part of the one-hour event. I suppose the singing is like the salad. It might be a little iceberg with some french dressing drizzled on it, or it might be a full-blown spring mix with mediterranean vegetables, feta cheese, and a razzle-dazzle house vinaigrette.

Some people don't mind skipping the salad, I mean worship, as long as they show up in time for the main event, the sermon. We go to church to get fed. Pastors are evaluated on their ability to produce an appealing message. In fact, this is usually considered the defining factor in their role of pastor, and many claim to spend the majority of their week preparing the Sunday morning dish.

In spite of questions about the sermon's effectiveness in spiritual transformation, I don't think the sermon is something that will change. It is what people want, what they expect.

Personally, I have probably sat through at least 2,000 sermons - 20 years of 20 minute protestant sermons, followed by 22 years of hour-long charismatic sermons, and now back to 20 minute evangelical sermons.

I have the spiritual gift of dining.

Pelican Feeding

2007-05-08T06:19:00.000-06:00

My next door neighbor lady, an interesting character, stopped over the other day for a visit. Her husband pastors a very conservative baptist church, and she only wears dresses and often a hat too. They recently adopted their 11th child.

While talking about her baby who is almost one, she complained about the many jars of baby food they go through. I asked her if he was eating table foods yet. Then I learned something new.

She described what she called pelican feeding. She chews the food and gives it to the baby. Ewwww!!! Maybe it is a cultural thing. Have some of you heard of this?

Apparently, even though the baby has some teeth now, he refuses to eat table food unless she chews it for him first.

It seems to me that if you have always chewed someone's food for them and only given them the easily digestible form, you shouldn't be surprised that they do not want to chew for themselves.

The Good Fight - Conclusion

2007-05-06T08:11:00.000-06:00

To be somebody in this world without Christ, you have to:

1. Look good enough so others will admire you.
2. Perform well enough so others will be impressed with your accomplishments.
3. Have enough social status so others will recognize you.

If we build our life around these values, we will lose it.

We grow weary in self-enthronement. Sin is that stubborn part of us that wants to live independent of God. Until we are broken, our life is self-centered and self-reliant. Our strength is our own.

To deny ourself is to give up our right to be the master of our life. God wants your heart for Himself. Our life is found in communion with Him.

We start by overcoming in our own life, and as we gain victory in our personal life, we lead our families to freedom, and we gain power and authority to impact the kingdom of God in our spheres of influence.

Do our lives make sense in light of eternity?

As the people of God, we have been sidetracked. Jesus said that we are to be in the world, but not of it. Instead, as the church, we have withdrawn from the world, yet adopted the social values of our society.

We are called to be different, and we are going to have to be different in order to make a difference. We have one life to spend, and there is only one cause worthy of our devotion.

This is the revolution, the cause, the good fight.

Andrew Jones described it this way:

"We need to not fall into the trap of dumbing down the challenge for all men everywhere to pick up their cross and follow Jesus into their manly quest to fulfill their destiny and finish their race with every good thing given to them to help them give away their gift to family and humankind."

The Good Fight - 4

2007-05-05T07:02:00.000-06:00

As I said earlier, this message was originally given on Father's Day, and it was directed as a challenge to men. This post will have that particular slant on it. While many of the men who blog no longer live this way, I believe that we all know men whose hearts are isolated, cold, and indifferent. The macho stereotype reinforces this tough protective facade. I do not share Driscoll's view of men, but rather believe that a truly strong and free man is nothing like the kind of man that Mark describes. These thoughts do not come from a low opinion of men, but rather from a frustration that even in our churches, men are often caught in a life of pretending and emotional emptiness.

"He will turn the hearts of the fathers to their children, and the hearts of the children to their fathers." Mal.4:6

In order for this to happen, men's hearts must be free so they can give themselves to their children.

Men are good at giving things. They give advice and provision, but they often have big problems when they are asked to give themselves. If a man refuses to give himself, then his family will remain empty.

Men find it hard to give themselves because they are afraid to be real and afraid to be vulnerable. What they primarily fear is someone finding out who they really are.

"I was afraid because I was naked, so I hid." Gen.3:10

Many men are wrestling with inner fear, afraid of intimacy and feelings. They are great "hiders." They hide their love, and they hide their fear. They hide behind the newspaper or the television and won't really talk to their wife or children. They hide behind passivity and won't confront difficult situations.

This habit of hiding destroys homes, robbing wives of intimacy, alienating children, and frustrating the man's relationship with God. You do not have to look far to see the frustration of women who cannot get their husband to connect and of children who cannot find their father's love or approval.

An angry man destroys with his words,
and a silent man starves his wife and children.

Silence wraps itself around a man like a blanket, insulating him from the risk of rejection. We develop defense mechanisms to protect ourselves. The things we do to protect our heart are sometimes the things that actually destroy us.

Strongholds develop in our lives from the environment in which we were raised and the painful experiences in our pasts. These strongholds affect our temperaments and the way we relate to our spouses and children. They result in behavior patterns we have learned over time.

Manhood is rooted in childhood.

Old issues are the enemies of your soul. You have to be willing to confront issues that other men run from. Freedom only comes when you open up and face things you may not have admitted to anyone.

You are more than your childhood. You are more than your past. You are more than your circumstances. You are NOT who the enemy says you are!

The reason we face our past is because we want our future. It is frightening to stand naked before God. Losing the mask is painful. Underneath the mask is all the hurt and fear we've been running from and hiding from. To let it be exposed can shake you like an earthquake.

When you come to God in your nakedness, you will discover how refreshing and freeing it is to be forgiven and accepted for who you really are. We must face our fears head-on.

What we are journeying toward is freedom, to set our hearts free to dream holy dreams.

Here I must direct you to my friend Pam's post today where she so eloquently describes becoming free of the lies of the enemy.

"For a long time, an impossibly long time...I lived with a distortion of God's love and grace for me. I was convinced that God loved me only because He Had To.

I have discovered in quietness and steadiness that Jesus is not like me. I can be my own worst enemy. He is not like that. I would condemn myself. He does not. I am prone to define my life by my failures and missed opportunities. He defines me by his love."

The Good Fight - 3

2007-05-03T22:12:00.000-06:00

Our ability to serve the needs of others is dependent on our spiritual wholeness. The more we become like Christ, the more we are able to love others.

To the degree that we are hurt, we stay focused on ourselves.

Christian behaviorism results from an overemphasis on doing - do better, try harder. Many of us try and try, and fail and fail, until we finally give up.

What went wrong?

We cannot change our behavior without Jesus changing who we are. We must separate doing from being. Christ's good news is that we can become free in our innermost being.

Confronting the real issues in our lives seems to scare people to death. After years and years of fear, shame, and covering up our weaknesses and failures, the idea of facing them is often terrifying.

This is where the fight comes in, where the battle begins. Whether it is for yourself or for someone else, don't tell me it isn't a battle when you stand face to face with the lies that the enemy has told someone since they were a child, when they cower at the voice in their heart telling them they are a failure, or they are worthless, or they are just plain bad.

If the vicious cycle of hurt is not addressed, the pain passes down from father to son, mother to daughter, generation to generation.

This is a battle worth fighting. Yes, Jesus already purchased our freedom, but it is up to us to lay hold of it as a reality in our lives.

The Good Fight - 2

2007-05-03T12:46:00.000-06:00

Revolution begins with a vision.
The principles of revolution are self-sacrifice and dedication to the cause.

What is the cause for the men and women of God?
1. A call to follow Jesus by life or death.
2. A vision to impact the next generation.

To the revolutionary, the cause is worth dying for, and nothing else is worth living for. I am reminded of the saying, "You claim you would die for Christ, but will you live for Him?"

What do you see in the lives of the people of God?
Are they full of freedom and passion for the Kingdom?
Or have they lost heart? Are they captives of despair, disillusionment, or even boredom?

Is their mate deeply grateful for how well they are loved?
Are their children secure in their love?

What is the condition of our kingdom, the things God has entrusted to us?

Some day we will have to give an account for what has been entrusted to us, for whether we have affected our family in a positive way. We impart what we are, not what we talk about. This is why it is absolutely vital that we fight for the wholeness and redemption that are our inheritance in Christ.

In the kingdom of God, to lead is to come under others, serving and building, to put their needs above our own. At the heart of making others feel valuable, loved, and accepted is a decision to honor them above ourselves. This is only possible to the degree that our hearts are healed and our needs fulfilled by the love of Christ.

Clarifications, Maybe

2007-05-03T07:52:00.000-06:00

Thankfully this is an interactive blog, and I appreciate you guys keeping me on my toes.

After reading Sue's link to Ben's blog and Bob's response to my previous post, I had to think about if I was really saying what I intended or simply passing along rhetoric.

As you can see, I have retitled the series and edited the first post. I don't believe that the words warrior and hero convey the message that I want to say.

There is a call to become actively engaged in the life of the Spirit. It isn't a call to greatness, but rather to sacrifice, vulnerability, and death to self.

Are we willing to engage in that fight, especially when the path to victory requires our brokenness rather than our success?

Our life as free men and women of God is the life of a subversive warrior, one who turns the other cheek, one who blesses rather than curses.

We do all of this in the knowledge that as our freedom is won, we ultimately lose our own life.

The Good Fight - 1

2007-05-02T07:46:00.000-06:00

(edited)

Bravery, courage, valor...

How do you see yourself as a man? Are words like strong and passionate words that you would choose to describe yourself?

Do you have what it takes to be an overcomer?
God's heart is for each of us to live free.

Do you have the heart to conquer?
Or have you already been defeated and beaten?

The battle we fight is for our freedom. Much of the Bible describes God's warring activity. God's jealousy is for the heart of his people and for their freedom.

God's purpose if for the redemption and restoration of all things to wholeness. The enemy wants to stop the Kingdom by defeating us and keeping us captive.

If a man succeeds in securing his life against all risk, he will wind up in a cocoon of self-protection and wonder why he is suffocating.

The enemy appeals to the traitor's desire for self-preservation. As long as we are trying to save ourselves, his tactics will work. We will shrink back.

But the opposite is also true. When a man resolves to overcome, when his life is given over to knowing truth and freedom, then he cannot be intimidated.

Above all else, an overcomer has a vision, not only for his own freedom, but for participating in the restoration of others. This is a cause greater than self-preservation.

The Good Fight - Intro

2007-05-02T06:59:00.000-06:00

I got distracted. I've been off fighting a war to which I wasn't invited.

On a more positive note...

The issues of this week reminded me that quite a few years ago, I gave a sermon directed at men that had a warrior slant to it.

Today I pulled out my outline to remember what it said. There are some cringe-worthy parts, some things that I view differently now, but there are also some themes and messages that still ring true to me.

There are quite a few things that I would like to share and discuss here. I would like to post portions of that message in blog-size pieces and hopefully will be able to keep both your interest and mine.

What place do I have speaking about men and masculinity? While my message was directed at men, I think that it applies to all of us. The heart of the message is becoming free to be the person that God created you to be.

I hope you enjoy the series and find something of value to you.

Sex, Lies, and Videotape

2007-05-01T08:13:00.000-06:00

Update:
Bill Hybels did not criticize Mark Driscoll or his video.
The allegedly banned videos were available and distributed.

Further discussion:
The Internet Monk has an interesting post with the unfortunate title, Daily Sex With Pastor Mark. Let me assure you that it is not actually about daily sex with Pastor Mark.

Andrew Jones has posted an attempt to clarify some of the rumors resulting from the blogstorm sparked by Mark's original post on the Resurgence blog. I am curious whether the 100's of people who took Mark's conclusions as gospel will now man up and retract their accusations and claims.

Helen has posted both Mark's video and a video by Jen about gender attitudes that just happened to come onto the scene during (but not in response to) the controversy over Mark's video.

My Former Underlying Beliefs

2007-04-28T20:00:00.000-06:00

This is written to give you a little background about my post Underlying Issues. If you have not read the Underlying Issues post yet, it might be helpful in understanding this post. I hope that I can convey that deconstruction does not have to be reactionary, negative, or destructive.

There have now been quite a few posts in the TPFKATC meme and quite diverse reactions to those posts. My writing about the issues was not to place blame on pastors or on institutional churches. I wanted to point out the issues and topics that influence the way I view church today.

I am fully responsible for what I believed and how I behaved as a participant in my former church. A key element of change is dissatisfaction with the current system of beliefs. Unlike many people, I was not sitting silently in a system I no longer agreed with.

I was fully invested, overly involved, and wholeheartedly promoting a system that I believed in and trusted to be an accurate expression of the body of Christ. I knew that things were not perfect, but that was never my expectation, and honestly, my willingness to adapt was pretty high.

I do not know why God in His grace yanked us out of there, but I am incredibly grateful that he did. My beliefs may not have changed if we were still involved in our CLB. In order to give you a glimpse at what the process of detox and deconstruction has done regarding my beliefs about the underlying issues, let me explain in comparison my take on the issues 5 years ago:

Passivity
This referred to the people who tended to sit in the back rows, who didn't sign up for our latest class, program, or conference. They weren't on board, they didn't get it, they weren't really with us.

Clergy/Laity
Participation was important, but it hinged on everyone coming in line with the vision of the senior leader. This was the most effective method for us to move forward in unity as a body of believers.

Tithing
God's blessing and provision in our life depended on our obedience in this area. The only legitimate place for the tithe was the local congregation where you were being fed. Other giving to missionaries and ministries would be considered offerings above the tithe.

Buildings
Since the prophetic words to our church were that we would be an equipping center, God would provide the resources necessary for an adequate campus.

Attractional methods
We considered ourselves more of an advanced church and accepted that our teaching and flavor were not necessarily for the masses. In fact, being misunderstood by the public was just part of the price of being a cutting-edge ministry. As for the lost, the evangelists were supposed to be reaching them.

Programs
I fully believed and taught that involvement in the programs and ministry of the church was the path to spiritual maturity and advancement in the kingdom. Zealous pursuit of these activities was a reflection of commitment and service to God.

Dualism
The ministry that we did at the church was our calling. Our secular work was viewed as a means to support our involvement in ministry.

Incarnational living
What is that? I had blinders on to everyone and everything outside of the ultra-important sphere of church life.

Following the spirit
We were all about following the spirit. But in following, it was always about deeper, not wider - not beyond our worship services, intercessors meetings, and revival conferences.

Servant leadership
This was probably the first crack in the structure that would eventually break apart for me. While I had been a willing and trusting follower for years, I could not seem to go along with the teachings on rank and position.

Is detox and deconstruction negative? I don't think so, especially when it is the Holy Spirit showing you the error of your ways. For me, detox has not been an angry reaction toward them. It has been a repentant process of recognizing the weakness and falseness of things that I bought into without question. It has been an honest search to understand God's heart and intention for the church in our world today.

These issues matter to me. They represent areas of personal growth and change in my thoughts and beliefs. While they are not meant to be attacks against the institutional church, they are intentional movements toward a way of being church that is different.

Change in its very nature is a rejection of the way things have been. We can be careful to not be inflammatory or polarizing, but the desire for change will always be a challenge to those who do not share that desire.

Just the Facts, No Snark

2007-04-28T18:00:00.000-06:00

Since I apparently have too much time on my hands today to stay out of trouble, I will update you on the latest controversy surrounding Mark Driscoll and his video at the National Church Planting Conference.

The video can be seen in it's entirety at Mark's blog. It speaks for itself.

The main source of controversy from both sides seems to be the comment made by Bill Hybels after the video. I am not going to argue whether Bill Hybels should have said what he did or not.

For the record, this is what Bill Hybels said:

"There are women in this world, and many of them are used by God in church building, and they have spiritual gifts useful in church planting too, just to set the record straight."

From Mark's blog:
"Apparently the video was shown at the event, was well received by the attendees, and then criticized by Bill Hybels from the stage because it did not speak of women church planters."

There is a difference between acknowledging the women in the room and criticizing Mark. I do not see in Bill's comment that he criticized Mark. Bill's alleged criticism of Mark is the story that is being repeated by Mark's defenders.

For the record, Mark's video has not been banned.

From Mark's blog:
"I thought we should at least post the banned video online."

Choosing not to distribute the video is not the same as banning it as Mark claims. I do not know why Mark would choose to use incendiary language in describing this. This is the tone now being repeated by others in inflammatory posts about the incident.

For the record, we know that Mark loves the ladies.

"Sixty percent of all Christians today are female. I'm glad that the ladies love Jesus." - Mark Driscoll, from the video

I don't know why Mark is always so misunderstood.

Moose Slippers, Tattoos, and Traditional Church

2007-04-27T08:05:00.000-06:00

A few miscellaneous thoughts from last weekend spent with my family:

My sister told a story about an accident she witnessed. Actually she heard the accident and came out of her office to see what happened. Standing in the parking lot, she watched as the driver of one of the vehicles crawled up out of the window of his car which had landed turned on its side.

Apparently he was having difficulty crawling out due to an inability to keep his sweatpants on. Several people were mooned during his exit of the vehicle. Once free, he took off running, still struggling to keep his pants up. In addition to the pants issue, his running was also hindered by the fact that he was wearing MOOSE SLIPPERS!

It just so happened that he ended up running right past my sister in the parking lot, and it just so happened that he lost his moose slippers right in front of her. Hesitating momentarily, he quickly decided to abandon the moose slippers where they had landed.

It was at this moment, that my sister realized (duh!) that this man was fleeing the scene of the accident. Her sense of law-abiding justice triggered, she took off in pursuit of the "criminal."

That is just funny because none of us sisters are especially known for our athletic abilities. And even if she were able to catch him, she had no idea what she would have done next, probably use her angry voice to scold him.

So the slipperless criminal eluded her, and she returned to the parking lot to hand over the evidence (moose slippers) to the investigators. My sister, the hero.

......................................

My dad took the whole family bowling on Saturday afternoon, there were about 20 of us including son-in-laws and grandkids. While we were there, I saw that my BFF from high school was there too, so I went over to say hi.

Surprised to see me, she said, "What the hell are you doing here?!"

Just a reminder of how sanitized my life is. I need more tattooed friends that swear at me.

.....................................

It was nice attending my parents' church on Sunday morning. I appreciate the sense of belonging and history in a church like theirs. Many of the people there have known me my whole life, and many of them have known my parents most of their life, even from their childhood.

I also appreciate the sincerity of their pastor. It is obvious that he loves the Lord and that he loves the people that he has chosen to serve. He nurtures and encourages them. In their fellowship, I see a group of people who are deeply connected to one another. It is good; there is life and love there.

I see the relevance and validity of small, local congregations like this one.

A Little Behind

2007-04-23T05:29:00.000-06:00

We have been out of town for a few days. I will do my best to get caught up soon with reading and replies.

It might be a day or two before I am ready to post again. It seems my thoughts didn't arrive at home yet with my body.

Hopefully I will find my groove soon,
or maybe I will find a new groove. ;)

Average Jane Misfit

2007-04-17T06:14:00.001-06:00

I would like to point you to my friend Cindy's post, Place and Time, where she brilliantly voices some thoughts about the emerging conversation and about the awkwardness toward church that it creates.

It seems that if we embark on the journey of discovery about emerging church and challenge the traditions we have known, we find ourselves stuck in an inbetween place - no longer in synch with the old, but often not part of something new.

Perhaps there should be a warning on emerging/missional blogs - "Beware! Reading this blog will seriously hinder your ability to fit in traditional church settings!"

I really resonated (smile) with Cindy's post because I feel like the poster child for misfits.

When I sit in church, all of the underlying issues, the beliefs that don't fit in at normal church, sit beside me like an unruly child that occasionally needs shushing.

As Cindy said, "I don’t fit at church (any that I know of) anymore. Neither do I fit out of church."

Those who don't fit the church still carry a deep passion for the church. Heidi Daniels describes it like this in her post "The Girl Formerly Known as a Normal Christian":

"I am the girl who slowly but surely moved away from being an attendee at a church and being to realize that the passion God had given me for his church wasn't about buildings, or programs, or budgets, or attendance."

I think that many, after a time of reactionary thinking, learn to harness thoughts and energies, to contain them with socially-acceptable restraint. We learn to be more comfortable with the tension of being a misfit, no longer biting on the bridle that holds our tongue from accidentally spilling these thoughts.

We can learn to behave, right Randy?

"But I’m not a prophet. I shouldn’t have to be without friends. I guess I should just dumb myself down, overlook the stuff I see, stop worrying about it, be another evangelical robo-Christian, get some bumper stickers, put a fish on my car, and get with the program. I can be a fun guy."

Fr'nklin, who eventually succeeded (kind of) in adapting, describes it like this, "I was still going in the opposite direction, but I was a pleasant rebel...a likable revolutionary."

And what about the conversation?

Occasionally I read concerns about the diversity of the conversation, questioning whether it is strictly for educated, white males. I have often felt that it is mostly a conversation among theologians, pastors, and professionals.

In spite of my blog name, I don't have much invested in the emerging part of the conversation. The only aspect of emerging that is significant to me is the willingness to consider changes to the structures and models of church we have known. In that regard, I am not interested in stylistic changes, but rather in changes that affect the fruitfulness and redemptive ministry of the church in the world.

If this is truly a grass-roots movement of the Spirit, there has to be a place in the conversation for the Average Jane and Joe. For many of us, simply stepping out of the church bubble and shifting the focus of our relationships to people in our community is a radical change in our Christian walk. It doesn't have the glamor of overseas or urban ministry. The missional things that we accomplish have an air of ordinariness about them.

I plan to keep blogging as an Average Jane in the conversation. For now, blogging is my remedy for the dilemma of not fitting in.

Do you remember in Forrest Gump when he started running and had this need to keep running for "three years, two months, fourteen days, and sixteen hours", and then suddenly one day, he was done? That's how I see blogging. I started, and for now, I just keep blogging and blogging, but I think that some day, I'll just be done.

"That's all I have to say about that."

Classic TallSkinnyKiwi

2007-04-16T09:42:00.000-06:00

In response to John MacArthur's book:

"The Emerging Church is NOT the new skid on the jock."

Andrew Jones

Emerging from the Wilderness

2007-04-14T21:40:00.000-06:00

"The material that will give birth
to the mission of Jesus in this nation
ought to be identified by spiritual muscle,
by the fact that we are the ones
who went to the wilderness
where the wild beasts are,
and we have returned from that place
to serve the poor,
the marginalized,
the unchurched,
the postmodern.

We have returned
to minister among them,
alongside them,
in partnership with them,
as people with enough muscle
to model what it is like
to be free from human appetite and need."

Michael Frost

If you would like to hear it with an Aussie accent, listen here.

Already Missional?

2007-04-13T06:56:00.000-06:00

Earlier this week, I read this excerpt from Geoff Surrat in a post by Bob Hyatt entitled Attractional with a Side of Missional. I've been thinking about it ever since then:

"Every church I've been around is missional; they all see their members as missionaries in their communities."

Would you say that this is a lived-out reality for most of the church people that you know?

In my experience, I would rephrase that to say,

"Every church believes in evangelism and missions; they would like their members to be missionaries in their communities."

It seems to me that there is a disconnect between what we believe and what we do. Mental assent does not equal action.

Sure we all care about the lost. But when did the lost become a nebulous group? Statistics show that if we've been in the church bubble for any length of time, we no longer have relationships with them.

"The Spirit is moving in marvelous ways again. Movements are being sparked and the established church is just beginning to wake up to itself and its missional calling. But shedding Christendom is no easy task. The transition from Christendom modes to genuinely missional ones will not necessarily be an easy one for most churches and church leaders." -- Alan Hirsch

It seems to me that the realization that we are not already missional would be the first necessary step in waking up to our missional calling.

Thinking Bloggers

2007-04-12T20:13:00.000-06:00

Okay, I've been trying to get this posted all week, but the people in life keep expecting me to do all this other stuff!

Many thanks to my friends Robin (4-time winner of the thinking-blogger award!) at Pensieve and John Smulo at Smulospace for including me in their lists and saying nice things about me.

Lest any of you fear that I'll get the big head, let me assure you that the people I live with keep me humble. My kids are getting a lot of mileage out of the fact that I fell out of my chair at the dinner table the other night. (No, alcohol was not involved!)

Anyway, back on topic, I don't do memes that often, but I wanted to take this opportunity to point to a few of the blogs that really make me think.

Since I recently linked to 5 other blogs in the under-appreciated blogger scheme initiated by Brother Maynard, I will not include them here, although they all would have definitely fallen into this category also. John Smulo and several other great blogs have already been listed, so I will not repeat them.

1. Scott Berkhimier at Theopraxis
Scott's posts consistently challenge me, not only intellectually but also spiritually. I often find myself revisiting his posts for further consideration.

2. Rob McAlpine at Robbymac
Robby stretches my imagination toward that which I cannot yet see. His emphasis on the life and power of the Spirit is a vital aspect in conversations about church.

3. Larry Chouinard at Spiritual Conversations
Although he doesn't post very often, Larry's reflections on Scripture never fail to inspire me.

4. Wayne Jacobsen at Lifestream
Wayne's writing carries an element of wisdom that I find helpful in keeping my focus and perspective on my relationship with the Father.

5. Kester Brewin at Signs of Emergence
I am especially interested in Kester's thoughts on leadership and the use of power in kingdom relationships. I am still pondering his latest posts on game theory and strategy.

Since my blogroll contains 30 of the best thinking blogs around, be sure to check there for more stimulating and interesting blogs to visit.

If you choose to post your own list of 5 blogs that make you think, please link to the original post.

TPFKATC - The Underlying Issues

2007-04-01T22:05:00.001-06:00

There is a path of detox and deconstruction that leads to an understanding of the underlying problems in the system of church that Christianity has functioned in for many years. Most who follow this path still have an appreciation for the traditional church although they can no longer wholeheartedly embrace the packaged religious experience.

To be honest, I tire of the assumption that those who come to this place are simply bitter and critical. The reason that Bill's post, The People Formerly Known as the Congregation, hit the blogosphere with such a splash is because there are so many people who sense the validity of the issues he addresses in his post.

There are many who find themselves in agreement with Bill's post, not out of a critical attitude, but because of a deep conviction that God's Spirit is moving within the hearts of his people to bring about the transformation and reformation required for the church - His Church, which we love deeply - to become the vehicle of redemption that will impact the world in our generation.

This is not a simple case of "for or against." There are specific issues that we are convinced have been a hindrance to growth in the maturity of the church and the advancement of the kingdom of God.

Do we have a better way? Oftentimes not. However, we have placed ourselves in a position of learning and experimenting. We will boldly or perhaps foolishly go against the status quo in our attempts to follow the direction of God's movement.

If you read through the list of issues covered in Bill's post, you will see traditions that are being deconstructed. You will also see values presented that we hope to express in our lives in a positive effort to re-imagine who we are as the people of God.

Passivity
We are convinced that a church system which allows believers to fulfill their weekly spiritual obligation by listening to a sermon creates a consumerist audience who have not been encouraged to step into the responsibility of being a disciple and discipling others.

Clergy/Laity
We have seen that the false distinction between clergy and laity has led to a professionalization of ministry which contributes to the passivity of congregants.

Tithing
We believe that tithing has been taught as a method of obligatory giving in order to create a permanent source of funding for institutions. We believe that we are to develop a relationship of obedience to the Holy Spirit concerning our giving rather than simply paying our dues to a religious system.

Buildings
We are convicted that the millions of dollars spent on buildings for churches has not been wise stewardship of the resources that have been entrusted to church leaders.

Attractional methods
We understand from Scripture that it is our duty and mission to go to the lost rather than to expect them to come to us.

Programs
We are convinced that becoming busy with programs within the church removes us from developing relationships with those who aren't involved in church. We no longer equate service in church programs with faithful commitment and service to God.

Dualism
We no longer see a Sunday morning service as the complete expression of our sacred lives. We have developed an understanding of our role as the people of God that requires being the church in all that we do.

Incarnational living
We purpose to minister in the opportunities that our daily lives present, and we are intentional about involving ourselves in the lives of others in deeper ways than a Sunday service allows or requires.

Following the spirit
We are convicted that dependence on the Holy Spirit is required to move forward into becoming the people we were created to be. We are also convinced that the Holy Spirit is leading us away from the systems and structures that provide a comfortable complacency rather than the challenging mission we are called to.

Servant leadership
Lastly, we see clearly that the hierarchical structures of leadership that have been taught through tradition are not scriptural. We know that the methods of leadership that are so often defended as biblical are at odds with the type of relationships that Jesus intended for us to have with one another.

We have not come to these convictions carelessly or casually. They will shape and inform our spiritual journey whether we continue in the traditional system or find another expression of church. Whether or not we ourselves are written off as reactionary, the church will eventually have to address the validity of these issues.

Getting Acquainted

2007-03-28T10:15:00.000-06:00

Due to Brother Maynard's latest campaign, I thought it would be a good idea to introduce myself to any of you who are new to this blog. Since my profile is fairly sketchy, here are a few of the basics of who I am.

I am middle-aged (not sure when that happened, but I don't wear bifocals yet).

I would say that I am a student of the emerging/missional conversation.

The aspect of emerging that I relate to is the willingness to deconstruct established structures and paradigms of church in order to reimagine the possibilities of what church could/should be.

I am a missional wannabe. Aware of my own tendencies toward selfishness, I am praying (begging) for a deeper revelation and understanding of God's missional nature and a greater expression of being missional in my life.

Trivia:

Currently reading -
Forgotten Way - Alan Hirsch
Rules of Engagement - Derek Prince

Recently read -
Dreaming with God - Bill Johnson
Permission Granted - Graham Cooke
Exiles - Michael Frost

Also, I am almost always reading something fiction. In the last month I've read a couple books by Karen Kingsbury, and a few others by Linda Nichols, Hannah Alexander, and Kristen Heitzmann.

And I skim 100 blogs in my spare time.

Favorite current TV:
Dancing with the Stars (I like the top 4.)
American Idol (Go Blake!)
Grey's Anatomy
I enjoy watching these with the kids:
House and Bones

Beverages:
Coffee - I like it strong and black
Margaritas - only when we go out for Mexican food
Wine - I usually prefer a shiraz or riesling

Music:
I like almost anything except country.
My radio is tuned to a christian station.
I like David Crowder, Chris Tomlin, Todd Agnew.
For worship lately, I am enjoying Kimberly Rivera.

About blogging:
I started blogging at a very lonely time in my life. Except for a couple of dear friends, I really had no one I could talk to about what we had experienced at our former church.

The blog became a place for me to express thoughts that I couldn't voice anywhere else. It also became a record of the detoxing process and our journey from that point.

It is now where I sort through and process all that I am learning. I have come to value greatly the interaction with those who respond to the things that I post. In fact, that is where I learn the most, as others bring perspective and nuance to the things I am wondering about.

I appreciate those who take the time to read and/or comment here. Therefore, I attempt to respond to comments consistently, although regretfully not always promptly due to limited computer time during the week.

I would like for this to be comfortable place where you feel welcome to join the conversation. I would love to have an opportunity to get to know you also.

If you are new or have been a lurker, how about saying hello and sharing:
a. A little something about you. AND/OR
b. What is the focus of your blog writing or reading.

If you are a regular, how about saying hello and sharing:
a. A little-known something about you. AND/OR
b. A burning question you've always wanted to ask me. ;)

Don't be shy!

Missional Among not Missional To

2007-03-27T08:11:00.000-06:00

Let's make sure we have the right preposition, especially in our heart and attitude.

Bob recently had this to say in his post Hero or Partner:

"I really don't think I can help a cause or community that I am not personally involved and invested in. If I'm not willing to share the community's fate (good or bad), how effective can I be? If I can insulate myself from the day-to-day realities; if I can step away (or move on) without personal consequences; if I can only sympathize and not empathize; I'm just a band-aid. A do-gooder who had the need to "pet the unfortunate" for a season--it makes you feel good, right?

But if I'm buying what I'm selling, I have to truly walk in the community's shoes. And they aren't necessarily comfortable."

Jamie says it like this in his post Serving Need:

"It is critically important to see that neutrality (which could probably be better defined as mutuality) must be the firm foundation upon which meeting needs must be built. Without the humble acknowledgment of our commonality, we can too quickly take on a paternalistic attitude towards those we serve. It is not the good Christians lowering themselves to serve the filthy masses. That is offensive, despite the very good intentions that fuel it. We need to serve people from below (foot washing) or alongside."

Mark asks this question in his post Follow the Money:

"This isn’t to say that we should forsake the affluent. But it is to say that we should stop starting with the affluent, building upon the affluent, and elevating the culture, style, and sensibilities of the affluent. Instead of building a church upon the “best of these,” in hopes of ministering later to the “least of these,” why can’t we simply go among the “least of these” at the very beginning?"

Which leaves me wondering about being missional in the suburbs.

Todd Hiestand has written an excellent article entitled Missional in Suburbia. I hope that you can take the time to read the entire thing. I will include a few quotes here to whet your appetite:

"Despite its nice exterior of SUV’s and housing developments, could it be that the suburban world is as God-forsaken as any place on the globe? This paper will argue that it is. If this is true, what does it mean to be the church in suburban America? What does it mean to be “missional” in a context where there are very few apparent and obvious needs?

There are at least four main ways the default suburban lifestyle needs to be challenged. First, we need to speak out against the suburban value of extreme individualism and call Christians back to community. Second, we need to deconstruct the value of consumerism in way that leads instead to sacrificial living. Third we need to question the suburban value of safety and comfort and judge it against the call of the gospel. Finally, we need to understand how our individualism and consumerism lead us to neglect the hurting and needy people in our neighborhoods and cities.

We need to be a Church that truly exists for the sake of others. We need a Church that gives up luxury so that others may have necessity. We need a Church that rejects the lone ranger mentality and lives in sacrificial and compassionate community. We need a Church that views money as a resource of God’s Kingdom and not an object to be consumed. We need a Church that trusts the Spirit and takes risks for the sake of the Gospel. We need a Church that comes together to care for the poor in their backyards as well as those in the city."

This is an indepth article well worth reading in its entirety.

What do you think? Especially if you find yourself in the midst of the suburbs, how do you live missionally among? Is your mission to find God at work among the suburbs? Or is it your responsibility to go to the margins? Can we go to and still be missional among?

Link Love

2007-03-26T18:01:00.000-06:00

UPDATED: Since a lot of folks were busy/out-of-town for the weekend.

Brother Maynard has come up with the interesting suggestion of circulating a list of under-rated, under-appreciated, or under-valued emerging/missional blogs to help promote them in the wider blogosphere.

Emerging Grace
Robbymac
Lily a.k.a. Erin
Nathan Colquhoun
John Smulo

Alan Knox
Bob
John Frye
Alan Hirsch
Rick (Rhymes)

To participate, copy this list into a new post on your own blog, and add the names you have to the bottom of the list, and encourage others to do the same. They should be people with under 150 links so we can truly scew the Technorati rankings. When you’ve done that, leave a comment at Brother Maynard’s blog so he can keep track of who ends up participating.

Don't Preach to Me About Tithing!

2007-03-24T23:32:00.000-06:00

I can't sit through another sermon about tithing.

Don't get me wrong, I believe very strongly in giving. In fact, I believe that we should learn to give at least 10% of what we have, not as a law, but as an expression that we will not consume everything we are given on ourselves.

Tithing is usually taught in a way that saddles an Old Testament law onto the church in order to provide funding for the organizations we have established. Usually this is done under the guise of the local church being declared the storehouse, which means that in order to be a legitimate tithe, your 10% must go to the storehouse. Then if you would like to give more, for example to missions or the poor, that would be considered an offering.

Tithing is a hollow act that replaces spirit-led giving and generosity. When we simply write the check, like paying our taxes or membership dues, we don't have to open our eyes to the need in the world around us. We assume we've done our financial duty, and the church or the government will take care of the needs of the world.

The problem though is that most of what is given to churches is also consumed by the churches in providing the weekly congregational meeting. What kind of giving is it that benefits oneself? And what kind of storehouse is it that distributes very little?

Less than 2 cents of every dollar given to American churches goes to international missions. The billions given to churches and spent by them, in comparison to what actually ends up in the hands of the poor demonstrates that we have not loved the poor.

In an era of growing American affluence, church leaders had an opportunity to lead members in expanding their global concern and giving. Instead we've raised the level of performance production and comfort in our attractional services. Giving solely for the purpose of institutional maintenance and programs promotes accumulation and personal comfort.

Don't even get me started on the prosperity preachers, their gospel of affluence, and their extravagant lifestyles. Even the world can see this is ridiculous! Yet when they are called to account, they dare to claim they are being persecuted for the sake of the Gospel?

Has the church been a trustworthy steward of our giving and resources?

On a related note...

Darryl Dash has a couple of incredible posts about Ron Sider and Shane Claiborne from the Evolving Church Conference that will challenge and inspire you concerning generosity, giving, and our responsibility to the poor. They are worth taking the time to read.

Ginger or Mary Ann?

2007-03-23T12:59:00.000-06:00

What do you think?
There are no right or wrong answers!

What About the Holy Spirit?

2007-03-20T08:17:00.000-06:00

I've been thinking lately about the Holy Spirit, especially in regard to the emerging/missional conversation.

The charismatics are credited with having the inside scoop about the Holy Spirit. However having come from there, I sometimes wonder if we really have a better understanding of the Holy Spirit or just of His toys - manifestations, spiritual gifts, and power.

Graham Cooke talks about how we view the Holy Spirit. We know the Father, and we know the Son, but the Holy Spirit is a bird?!

It is our inheritance to know the mind and heart of the Father, and the Holy Spirit is our downpayment of that inheritance. He is our constant companion and teacher in walking according to the purposes of the Father.

Unless we embrace and understand the necessity of His role in the life of a Christ-follower, I believe that our missional identity will be lacking the very mDNA we need to be the people of God.

I guess what I'm saying is that the Holy Spirit is our mDNA. Without Him we cannot be transformed into our true identity and purpose.

Why don't we have disciples? Because you can teach people about the Bible and Jesus and God and the church for 50 years, but until a person takes the first baby steps of developing a relationship of dependence of the Spirit, they won't be transformed.

You can be a good church-goer without ever learning to walk with the Spirit. In fact, walking with the Spirit can be a hindrance to fitting in with the church program. I dare say that we have taught people the church routine at the expense of teaching them the necessity of reliance on the Spirit for their activity and direction.

This is the missional element that will make the difference between being nice people doing works of service and justice or being people empowered with the life of the Spirit. We can't expect to fulfill the purposes of God without having an ongoing revelation of His heart and mind.

It matters not whether we're emerging, charismatic, baptist, or orthodox; we cannot truly live the life of a Christ-follower without a real relationship with the Holy Spirit. Sure we can go to church, but how do we live a life of everyday mission without seeing what the Father is doing? We were given the Holy Spirit for this very purpose, to show us the daily, in-the-moment things that we need to know in order to be in step with the Father's heart.

Our very identity as the people of God is dependent on our understanding of the purpose of the Holy Spirit in our life.

Are we really living as a people who have revelation of the mind and heart of the Father? How can we expect to understand His kingdom vision without entering into relationship with the Spirit given to us to provide that understanding.

We don't need to learn more about the Holy Spirit, but rather we need to become acquainted with Him, to develop a relationship of ongoing reliance and dependence on His guidance and insight into the kingdom realm.

We weren't created to just be church-goers. The people of God are to colabor with God, incarnating His life, hope, love, and redemption in all that we are and do. It is only by walking with the Spirit that we are enabled to live according to our true identity and purpose.

Final Thoughts on Permission Granted

2007-03-16T07:58:00.000-06:00

The remainder of the book was written by Gary Goodell and covers ideas about church, gatherings, and community. As I said before, this portion of the book reminded me a lot of the book Exiles.

The first section he wrote about worship was a very different focus than Michael Frost's approach in Exiles. The gist of Michael's message was that while worship is important, that service to others as an expression of our worship is something that we have neglected. Gary's focus on worship is on the importance of having gatherings that are solely devoted to spending intimate, spontaneous, unhurried time in God's presence together. I would just have to say that I agree with both of them.

Gary spends several chapters explaining why gatherings should be more participatory. He argues that the one-hour, sermon-centered meeting does little to equip and disciple others. He suggests moving away from this model of meeting and gives helpful encouragement and ideas for creating more participatory gatherings. This is just a taste of some really important thoughts that he shared about church. I think that his ideas would be especially helpful to an existing church or leader that wants to change their meetings for more active involvement.

Near the end of the book, he mentions an idea that is intriguing to me and that I have not seen discussed elsewhere. He talks about regional meetings. They are larger corporate meetings, perhaps monthly, for the purpose of worship and fellowship.

"These meetings are not about the meetings, but about the bringing together of the wonderful variety of groups and ministries within our region. It is the coming together of these uniquely different expressions of the Body of Christ that make these meetings so different and so exciting."

The meetings would be a wonderful collective experience for simple churches in the area. However, it would be great if other believers in the area were also involved for the purpose of breaking out of our isolated groups and embracing one another as the body of Christ in our area.

There would be nothing to join, but rather believers would be encouraged to participate in their regular church community, whatever model that happened to be. The purpose of the regional meeting would be for hubbing and connecting believers in a particular locality. Ideally, it would not only provide the opportunity for fellowship but also for connecting with others in the pursuit of various missional opportunities.

Doable? I don't know. Intriguing? Definitely.

Graham on Transition

2007-03-15T06:51:00.000-06:00

Continuing some thoughts from my previous post about the book Permission Granted...

One of the areas of teaching where I find Graham to be absolutely brilliant is his understanding of transition and God's process in transition. There are two chapters in the book devoted to the process of transition at the corporate level. The quotes that I will share here are about transition in our personal lives. They are from the Introduction, which is only about a dozen pages of the book.

"Every change involves a letting go of one thing to reach out for what is next. It is death by installments--the slow death of our mindsets our attitudes, perception, and paradigms with apparently nothing obvious to take their place.

There is a death process to be worked through in transition. Future fruit comes from present death.

He (God) loves the journey that we are on. He has carefully thought through all the stages that we will experience. Death and life combine in Him. Find meaning in Him, and you will understand your journey so much better. Everything begins and ends in Him."

"Transition usually throws us together in circumstances that are far less than ideal. Transition involves crisis. Yet crisis leads us to process, through which our road map will deliver us to a new place of promise if we faithfully complete this particular leg of the journey.

In all tribulations and transitions, it is the revelation of God's intention that allows an amazing strengthening to be released into the inner man.

This is the opportunity that God is giving to us in the crisis of transition. He is holding out the very process of inward change and development. Crisis is the door of inward opportunity opening through the danger of external circumstances."

And finally, this helpful bit of wisdom...

"I believe that God is reasonable, except when He chooses not to be."

Permission Granted

2007-03-11T09:38:00.000-06:00

Reading this book recently turned out to be the right book at the right time for me. Having just worked through articulating and posting my current thoughts on fluid, empowering leadership (part 1, 2, 3, and 4), it was encouraging to have those ideas affirmed in this book.

The book is co-authored by Graham Cooke and Gary Goodell. Graham covers the topics of empowering leadership and understanding the processes of God in transition. Gary covers more specific ideas about being the church. He actually discusses many of the same thoughts that Michael Frost presents in Exiles, some in parallel and others from an opposite point of view.

If you read my recent post "How to Ruin a Church", you have an understanding of my background with unhealthy church leadership. Graham brought great clarity to my mind about exactly what was wrong with that system. In Section One of Permission Granted, he explains the difference between organizational structures and organic growth and between functional and empowering leadership. This entire section was packed with wisdom concerning leadership style. I'll just share a few nuggets with you:

Functional leadership:
"A box has been created that captures people instead of captivating them. We create rules of behavior to keep people in the confines of what we determine is decent and in order. The problem is that our sense of order comes out of a functional paradigm that is cemented in the need for leaders to possess, acquire, and control. This is love with a hook, love that uses people but does not fulfill them. The box becomes the coffin of their dreams and aspirations."

Empowering leadership:
"Our goal is to facilitate the development of every believer in Christ. Corporate vision cannot be imposed from the top down. It has to grow from the ground up...Good leaders know how to facilitate people into their own personal vision and then see the release of that to complete the corporate picture and anointing. Everyone has a dream. Good leaders have the Father's touch to expedite the dreams of God through the hearts of His people."

Organizational structure:
"When we need rules and bylaws to keep people and control their behavior, we do not have an organization built on relationship that seeks to grow sons into fathers. Instead, we have created a system that can only contain and never fully release people. It mistrusts people who do not fit. It promotes people who toe the line. It produces establishment people for the purpose of maintaining the structure. The scaffolding has become more important than the building."

Organic growth:
"The church is a living system of intelligent, adaptable, creative, self-organizing, and meaning-seeking people, who may feel confined by something that should be releasing and empowering them to be the best they can be. Everyone hates to be confined. It destroys the soul and kills any initiative and creative desire.

The growth of people is always more important than the structural shape of the church. We cannot sacrifice the individual for the system. Consequently, we must grow people before we put them into a structure. Then we must ensure that the structure is in tune with their identity, calling, and destiny; or it will break them. People must be broken in their relationship with God, not by a church system that cannot give them freedom."

In the next couple of posts, I plan to highlight some of Graham's thoughts on transition and some of Gary's ideas about church that were especially inspiring to me.

Join the Conversation!

2007-03-09T08:38:00.000-07:00

There are some posts that are interesting or informative, and there are others where the real content of the conversation happens in the comments. I would like to point you to two of those conversations today and to encourage you to leave your thoughts. Both of these conversations would be better with your participation, so don't be shy!

Brother Maynard has a current post entitled "Missional 101:Getting Out of the House". It is about practical ways to break out of the church bubble. It is a follow-up post to another excellent post of his entitled "The Rule of 150 & The Mission of the Church". My husband and I are still discussing his thoughts about how involvement in church eventually removes us from the context of our former lives where we had relationships with nonbelievers. Stop in and share how you are learning to intersect your life with people outside of the church.

In the comment section of my last post entitled "Senior Pastor", there is a good discussion about how deconstruction affects the role of pastor and the future of that role as a vocation. Hopefully you can contribute ideas about how pastors can navigate this transition and maybe discuss the potential for traditional congregations to become missional communities. Again this conversation would benefit from your thoughts and comments.

TGIF!! I hope to pop in and add to the discussion as I am able. We are preparing for a big slumber party. My husband and son are leaving town in anticipation of the invasion of giggling girls.